"Pornography"

YOUR BOYFRIEND'S PORNOGRAPHY

Investigating the Effects of Pornography on the Psyche and Relationships




The other evening a female friend and I were having a conversation about pornography. She admitted to me that she feels that it's best for a man in a committed relationship to abstain from the use of pornography, as it may hinder his ability to get off by regular, conventional means. This really got me thinking. How does a man's use of pornography interfere with his intimate relationships? During sexual intercourse, does he require pornographic thoughts and memories to successfully get off? Can the use of pornography help or hurt physical relationships?
So, I set off and did a bit of research. I unconvered the following statistics:

*The pornography industry is larger than the revenue of the top technology companies combined: Microsoft, Google, Amazon, eBay, Yahoo!, Apple, Netflix, EarthLink

*25% of the total number of internet sex engine requests are pornographic in nature

*42.7% of internet users view pornography online

*Hollywood release 20 times more adult movies than mainstream productions

*87% of university students admit to having sex over webcams, instant messenger, and the telephone

*17% of all women struggle with porn addiction

*42% of adults admit to feeling less attractive due to their partner's use of pornography

*47% of adults say that pornography has become a problem in their home

*60% of all websites visited daily are pornographic in nature

*70% percent of Christians admit to struggling with porn in their daily lives

After looking at these numbers it is easy to conclude that the majority of men, and quite a few women, access internet pornography on a regular basis. Is this considered normal? How much is too much? When does curiosity become an obsession?

We are all aware that masturbation is a very healthy practice, physiologically and psychologically. There is nothing wrong with having fantasies, so as long as these fantasies don't manifest into a harmful reality. But what effect does over-exposure to pornographic material have on us?

Porn addiction has become an epidemic lately, similiar to drug-abuse and alcoholism. Many experts are in debate over this subject, saying that this problem is a compulsion rather than an addiction. Common signs of porn addiction/compulsion include:

1. An inability to stop the behaviors and porn use despite previous attemts to do do

2. Anger or irritability if caught or asked to stop

3. Hiding or attempting to keep secret either part, or all, of the porn use

4. Continuing the behavior despite obvious consequence, such as a relationship loss or job loss

5. Getting lost in the porn use, spending more time than intended looking at pornographic images, videos, etc.

Of course there are more serious effects of the overuse of porn for those already possessing mental disorders with a gravitation towards promiscuity, abuse, etc. Sexual therapists and psychologists have defined the following five stages of pornographic addiction:

1. DISCOVERY: This happens by accident or curiosity. This stage usually refers to initial exposure, rather than over a prolonged exposure of time. The thrill and arousal is viewed as a rush because the event represents entering an area that is taboo, forbidden, or simply sensually arousing.

2. EXPLORATION/EXPERIMENTATION: This is the stage where the person rationalizes exploring or experimenting with the material. Usually this is accompanied with masturbation.

3. DENSENSITIZATION: At this stage what was once seen as shocking, becomes either normal to the viewer, or even mundane, setting the stage for escalation.

4. ESCALATION: During the stage, the material becomes rougher and more explicit. Kinkier and more shocking material is needed to achieve the same rush that was discovered in Stage 1.

5. PERFORMANCE: The person will begin to reinact the sexual behaviors he or she may have seen depicted in the pornography. In some cases, they will perform these with their partner, or if married, look for a partner outside of the marriage.

Just to set things straight, I'd like to state that enjoying pornographic material will not turn you into a sexual deviant. Pornographic addiction is a form of sexual addiction, and does not effect everyone.



I'll be the first to admit that I love pornography, like so many other males do. I have a collection, and a number of websites that I visit on a regular basis. I don't feel that I am self-medicating in anyway through pornographic use, or that I am using it to substitue any type of regular sexual practice. I've always been very open and honest about it with my sexual partners, and feel that it can even add some excitement into the bedroom.

But, what are the boundaries of being able to safely enjoy it? How can it destroy or harm relationships? In your own opinion, is regular use of pornography a healthy or dangerous practice? I'm really interested in hearing some feedback on this topic. So, I impose upon you the following questions:

1. Do you mind if your partner views pornographic materials?

2. How much time spent looking a pornography is considered too much?

3. Have you ever caught your partner in the act of looking at adult materials? How did you react?

4. How would you react if you caught your lover viewing gay pornography, or pornographic materials outside of his/her assumed sexual orientation?

5. Do you consider cybersex/phonesex to be the same as infideltiy?

6. Do you believe that pornography can be appreciated as a couple, thus adding spice to intimate relationships?

7. Are you morally opposed, seeing the use of pornography as either sinful, or immoral?

I appreciate your feedback on this one peeps!

"Too Much Of Everything"

Youtube Nation
for everyone

Every move that you take. Every sound that you make. Every scandal that you created. Definitely one day it will be on Youtube. This decade shall be called an era of exploitation of almost all of the privacy that we have. With the help of recent technologies everything will be viewed on the internet. Whether you like a porn, or an educational one, no doubt they are on the web. With just click a mouse and everything is on our fingertips. Even if we are on the remotest village, we can still access the net and in an instant we are connected to the world.

With all of these privileges that our ancestors did not enjoy in the past, we can conclude that we are lucky enough to experience the abundance of information that are readily available anytime as long as we are connected wired or wireless. However they are still the perils of misguided information that can lead to nowhere. And with no restriction since the Web is free for all, most of the kids nowadays realized and are educated via the net. They can learn the many things the world has to offer whether they are bad or good. And mostly bad. And to add it on they are many online games that are supposedly for adults only can be played by kids.

Sometimes if we have to imagine the emergence of new ways of communication we can say that we cannot live without the convenience of those gadgets that become necessary for our survival. We can live without cellphones or internet at least for a day but since they are very common in our lives, a mere absent of those will become a deficiency in our part. We cannot imagine even for a single day that we are not to use our cellphones. However if we are to look back a few years back, we are living very normally without those technologies and still we are fully human. In other words we are slave to the very technology that we are embracing. But we love it. We really appreciate the seemingly endless possibilities that the digital revolution is bringing to us.

And what’s next for us will be the unimaginable. The things that existed only in science fiction will come to life. And a new revolution will sweep the world in unprecedented trend that one has imagine will one day be a reality. And we should look forward to it with all the positives in mind. We should learn to create a world of technological leap that will surely propel us to efficiency and much enjoyment in this life.

And never mind the utopians that only dreams of the world as a gloomy future ready for destruction. And it is us human could only decide what will be the best for us. And for the generations to come.