The Difference Between Sensual and Sexual?

SENSUALITY Vs. SEXUALITY

There are those who claim to be 'sensual' in the manner of dress and the way they present themselves to the public eye. Then there are those who are 'sexual' in nature and present themselves the same way in the public eye. What is the difference? Is there a difference? We all have our own take on what is sensual and what is sexual. I want to breifly explore the two and see how far apart they are or how close in nature they are.

The dictionary defines SENSUAL as,

1. Pertaining to, inclined to, or preoccupied with the gratification of the senses or appetites, carnal; fleshly. Unrestrained indulgence.

2. Lacking in moral restraints, lewd, or unchaste.

3. Arousing or exciting the senses toward sexuality. Influencing behavior and thoughts of others into immorality, wordly, materialistic, and irreligous thinking. SEXUAL is defined as, 1. Of or pertaining to sex; ocuuring between or involving the sexes or sexual behavior, including using devices (sometimes known as toys).

As one can note, there is a fine line between the two. Sensuality usually comes from the form of the female gender. Women are especially those who like to claim sensuality before they claim sexuality. With the explosion of "free love...free sex" in the 60's, bras, panties, and nice looking dresses became a hinderance to the female.

The sexual revolution began and now has turned in to the Sensual Revolution where women compete amongst themselves to bring to the table a finely trimmed body with voluptuous curves...all in the right places and showing just enough to make the man use his imagination for purposes other than getting to know the person inside. They will pose themselves in their skimpy and sometime see through underwear, shoulder straps dangling down allowing bras to slip down to the nipple area of the breast, they pull up their cute little pink nighties and expose their buttocks, or lay around in their black negligees, stand in their stockings with their thongs and call it sensual. Men see this and the immediate thought in their head is, "...love to get her in bed." No wonder so many men cannot relate to what has been written in a profile, they are too busy staring at the pictures and doing whatever they do in that moment...drooling, slobbering, and yes, even possibly masturbating.



If a woman thinks showing nearly all of her breast, and in some cases actual nipples seen through the clothing, then they have a long way to go before they realize what sensuality to a real man is. Most men, and I will speak for myself here also, are attracted to beautiful, good-looking, and cute ladies. Not necessarily in the sense of having sex with them, or going out with them, but in the sense that she takes care of herself and deserves an amount of respect. But, some of us are also impressed with minds too. I admire a woman who can carry on an intelligent conversation without one word associated with romance, sex, or sensuality involved.

I admire a woman like that as that is a form of sensuality unto itself. To a lot of men, this type of woman is frightening...scary to be around because she thinks for herself. I admire that type of woman. I admire that type of sensuality. A woman who thinks she has to show a large amount of skin in order to be sensuous or sensual is on the wrong track. If she feels this is how she must attract and lure men then she is deceiving herself as well as others. She lacks security in herself as well as in a relationship with one person. She has to have men looking at her to feel important. Most decent men do not want the lady in their life exposing themselves to the public in any type of fashion that can be used to exploit her shape, figure, form, or so-called beauty in a sexual or derogatory manner. That is not to say that a lady cannot wear clothing to fit her body, to bring attention to her beauty, to be 'sensual' and to look good in public.

Dress is a reflection of your personality and in my honest opinion, the less you have on and display in public, the weaker your personality. I have come to that conclusion through experience with those who call themselves sensual. Most men, including myself, love a woman on his arm that can attract the eye, not because of skin, but because of sheer beauty...inside and out. A woman that takes care of herself, mentally and physically, knows how this is true. Take care of yourself and you have confidence, an air about you that expresses sensuality. Being sensual and sexual in the same vein is not confidence in itself...it is narcissistic and vanity in most cases. Now sexual, lets admit, culminates from the sensual drive. It derives its power from sensuality and it weakens the flesh as well as the mind and spirit.

There are those, exibitionist in nature, who have no inhibitions about showing body parts of all sorts nor showing the various sexual encounters between humans...heterosexual and homosexual (which includes lesbianism). You can find anything you want on the internet these days, hell, its even here on myspace. Sexuality and sex can be two different things, but in most cases they are the same. Sensuality and sexuality are so closely related that in a lot of cases, there is no difference. You see it on tv, you see it at the malls, you see it in schools. It has infiltrated todays youth...some with a venom that will poison their lives forever. You want a sensual lady? I dare say that a sensual lady can be heavy, thin, medium, tall, and or short. She doesn't have to wear skimpy clothing nor show nearly all of her body parts to be sensual. She can wear an evening dress and be sensual. The right kind of clothes and if they are worn just right, can be as sensual as those who wear little or none. Start taking it off and you become sexual.

When and if a woman decides to take clothes off and pose in underwear, negligees, or for a picture taken in a bathroom with nothing but a towel hanging loosely in front of the body, and unbuttoned garments just to be showing skin, then she is reaching into the sexual part of her then so called 'sensuality.' And then, as a man, you have to wonder, who the hell is taking the some of these pictures...usually you can tell if they are self taken with a timer...look at the pose....that gives away the answer to that little question. (Oh it takes 10 seconds on a camera timer for the shot to be taken and you pressed the button and then got in that unusual position in ten seconds and had the shot taken? And the back ground and lighting techniques are just as you have it in your own living room? Yeah, right).

Beware...photos you take like that, sensual and sexual, and place in emails, websites, and blogs, profiles and pages, can come back to haunt you. That is the payoff of the internet. Once it is on the internet, it is there to stay in somebody's vault. If they want that, then go pose for Victoria's Secret catalog, Playboy magazine, or hell for that matter, Hustler. I call that exhibition...wanting and needing someone to look at them. Exploiting there own bodies for attention...which is their receipt of payment. Wanting attention. That may be what it is..."ADD"...attention deficit disorder. They seem to be starving for attention not from one person but from many. They are not happy with one person...not for long anyway.

They don't want love...they want recognition...comments about how beautiful they are, how gorgeous they are. I will tell my woman everyday how beautiful she is, not because of her sensuality, but because of who she is and what she means to me. Read some of the comments from men who don't even know the woman in her profile...look at some of the comments they leave for their so called sensual pictures. I dare say none of them use the word sensual...rather context like..."Oh Baby...you are sooooooooo Sexy...or 'Oh Baby you are so hot'...Is that bedspread mine? have we met together on it somewhere?" You never see..."Oh Baby...you are soooooooo sensual.

" Hell, you can even see comments left that infer to having sex with that person. Of course men are going to look. That is nature...men are creatures and we have a strong sexual desire, but there are those of us who can and do remain loyal to our spouses, fiance's, girlfriends, or significant others. The world of sensuality and sexuality does not interfere with our normal functions in life or influence some of us to the point that we fall into the quagmire and the trappings of lapping tongues and erect penises and trying to get our satisfaction elsewhere instead of from our partner.

Many a relationship has been destroyed because of one's "SENSUALITY." So, in my view, this is what sensuality is. It is meant for your partner's eyes...not for the whole world. If you are not an actress, a model, a Vegas Showgirl, a singer,or a strumpet save it for the person you love. Otherwise, show it and we will look. Produce it and you become exploited. I, personally, and probably because I am from the old school, have learned that if my woman is showing more than half of her body to people she doesn't even know and its on myspace, Yahoo, Mate1, adultfriends, or what ever other sites there are, then she is not being true to me. There isn't a lot of difference between sensuality and sexuality when you get right down to it. It can and will create havoc in a relationship as well as your personal life.

Some men see it and think they own you...they don't take NO for an answer. These men can really create problems for you. Some men see it and use your image for their own self satisfaction from their imaginations. Some men see it and wonder why this beautiful person presents herself like this... Others ignore it. In the long run...women use it to lure...and then wonder why they don't get and start begging for respect. So, In my humble opinion, very few people, like Marilyn Monroe for example, are the epitomy of sensuality (and at times, yes, sexual). But, there is an air about them, an aura, a halo around their heads that demand respect. They could put on a long dress and sensuality just reeked across the room. True beauty comes in many forms and it doesn't have to be naked to catch the eye.

That type of person?...They could wear sweats and still be very sensual. Its the attitude...not the way one dresses...or undresses. The way they walked, the way they talked, they way they dressed was unique and sensual unto itself. People like others who think they are sensual because they present themselves in underwear and negligees (not talking about catalogs here) and other articles of wear just to get men to look at them and drool, that is not sensual, it is sexual and in the long run you are hurting yourself. Remember, take care of yourselves...looks do not last a lifetime. It is better to have someone you can talk to now, because later in life, the beauty, the sensuality will not be present and it is not any fun talking to yourself...believe I know. And if you won a person's heart on the fact that sensuality was the weapon and the lure you used, then you will be in for a long lonely life. On my Myspace page, there are quite a few people (ladies) who are on my site with some photos that are "sensual" in nature.

Most of them are in show business. Very few are just everyday, hard working people who aren't in show business. They are there for a reason. Not because I want to gawk at their bodies and sit and imagine, but because some of them have requested me because they like my music. Others I requested, not because of sex, but because they seemed like decent people. I dare say, no pornographic sites are on my friends list...and unless someone slips through, no porno will be on my friends list. So, be sensual, but remember the restraints that morality has with it. Because sensuality is the root of sexuality. Not much difference when you really think about it.

"Pornography"

YOUR BOYFRIEND'S PORNOGRAPHY

Investigating the Effects of Pornography on the Psyche and Relationships




The other evening a female friend and I were having a conversation about pornography. She admitted to me that she feels that it's best for a man in a committed relationship to abstain from the use of pornography, as it may hinder his ability to get off by regular, conventional means. This really got me thinking. How does a man's use of pornography interfere with his intimate relationships? During sexual intercourse, does he require pornographic thoughts and memories to successfully get off? Can the use of pornography help or hurt physical relationships?
So, I set off and did a bit of research. I unconvered the following statistics:

*The pornography industry is larger than the revenue of the top technology companies combined: Microsoft, Google, Amazon, eBay, Yahoo!, Apple, Netflix, EarthLink

*25% of the total number of internet sex engine requests are pornographic in nature

*42.7% of internet users view pornography online

*Hollywood release 20 times more adult movies than mainstream productions

*87% of university students admit to having sex over webcams, instant messenger, and the telephone

*17% of all women struggle with porn addiction

*42% of adults admit to feeling less attractive due to their partner's use of pornography

*47% of adults say that pornography has become a problem in their home

*60% of all websites visited daily are pornographic in nature

*70% percent of Christians admit to struggling with porn in their daily lives

After looking at these numbers it is easy to conclude that the majority of men, and quite a few women, access internet pornography on a regular basis. Is this considered normal? How much is too much? When does curiosity become an obsession?

We are all aware that masturbation is a very healthy practice, physiologically and psychologically. There is nothing wrong with having fantasies, so as long as these fantasies don't manifest into a harmful reality. But what effect does over-exposure to pornographic material have on us?

Porn addiction has become an epidemic lately, similiar to drug-abuse and alcoholism. Many experts are in debate over this subject, saying that this problem is a compulsion rather than an addiction. Common signs of porn addiction/compulsion include:

1. An inability to stop the behaviors and porn use despite previous attemts to do do

2. Anger or irritability if caught or asked to stop

3. Hiding or attempting to keep secret either part, or all, of the porn use

4. Continuing the behavior despite obvious consequence, such as a relationship loss or job loss

5. Getting lost in the porn use, spending more time than intended looking at pornographic images, videos, etc.

Of course there are more serious effects of the overuse of porn for those already possessing mental disorders with a gravitation towards promiscuity, abuse, etc. Sexual therapists and psychologists have defined the following five stages of pornographic addiction:

1. DISCOVERY: This happens by accident or curiosity. This stage usually refers to initial exposure, rather than over a prolonged exposure of time. The thrill and arousal is viewed as a rush because the event represents entering an area that is taboo, forbidden, or simply sensually arousing.

2. EXPLORATION/EXPERIMENTATION: This is the stage where the person rationalizes exploring or experimenting with the material. Usually this is accompanied with masturbation.

3. DENSENSITIZATION: At this stage what was once seen as shocking, becomes either normal to the viewer, or even mundane, setting the stage for escalation.

4. ESCALATION: During the stage, the material becomes rougher and more explicit. Kinkier and more shocking material is needed to achieve the same rush that was discovered in Stage 1.

5. PERFORMANCE: The person will begin to reinact the sexual behaviors he or she may have seen depicted in the pornography. In some cases, they will perform these with their partner, or if married, look for a partner outside of the marriage.

Just to set things straight, I'd like to state that enjoying pornographic material will not turn you into a sexual deviant. Pornographic addiction is a form of sexual addiction, and does not effect everyone.



I'll be the first to admit that I love pornography, like so many other males do. I have a collection, and a number of websites that I visit on a regular basis. I don't feel that I am self-medicating in anyway through pornographic use, or that I am using it to substitue any type of regular sexual practice. I've always been very open and honest about it with my sexual partners, and feel that it can even add some excitement into the bedroom.

But, what are the boundaries of being able to safely enjoy it? How can it destroy or harm relationships? In your own opinion, is regular use of pornography a healthy or dangerous practice? I'm really interested in hearing some feedback on this topic. So, I impose upon you the following questions:

1. Do you mind if your partner views pornographic materials?

2. How much time spent looking a pornography is considered too much?

3. Have you ever caught your partner in the act of looking at adult materials? How did you react?

4. How would you react if you caught your lover viewing gay pornography, or pornographic materials outside of his/her assumed sexual orientation?

5. Do you consider cybersex/phonesex to be the same as infideltiy?

6. Do you believe that pornography can be appreciated as a couple, thus adding spice to intimate relationships?

7. Are you morally opposed, seeing the use of pornography as either sinful, or immoral?

I appreciate your feedback on this one peeps!

"Satisfy Your Man Anytime,Anywhere & Any Position"

How can you satisfy your lover in bed?

If you really want to know what makes a woman good in bed it is really just four things.... Passion, Desire, Love and Trust... If you find a woman with those four quailties then everything else will fall into place...

Sometimes, being physical with your man whom you love dearly, becomes dull and monotonous. Why so? This is a fact, everything in this world seems to get dull, though it is not so, it is the style or manner with which we handle certain things and situations that become dull. And for that, one or the other has to make some efforts to make things exciting around you.

And if your sexual activity with your man is getting quite predictable, then its the time to bring some changes. Do not always take your man for granted, I mean, do not always expect him to initiate the love-making, why can't you begin to express what you desire for?

This will make the environment really hot!!! Your man will feel the happiest ever!
As surprises are always welcome to make your relationship happening!

Wake him up with sex, giving his body your hot sighs and sensuous gestures anywhere and everywhere you like! This is the hottest thing a woman can do to arouse her man to the climax. I bet! Never lie down on bed with your man like a dummy, instead take the initiative to make your man happy.

Just ignore other distractions around or outside your bedroom- At the time of love-making, if there is happening something outside your house or the voices of your family members trying to distract you. Just look into each other's eyes and have a laugh and continue.

Also, do not hesitate to tell your man indirectly, that what and how you want him to treat you when in bed. Its your duty to make your partner aware of what kind of sexual pleasure you want and in what manner. With this, both of you will enjoy the act of love-making without any desires unfulfilled.

And please, please, never make your man feel that he is or was wrong somewhere while having sex with you. As this will shatter his self-confidence thereby making the things worse for both of you. If you felt that he was lacking something or gone wrong somewhere, then have a chat just after sex.

Ask him in a different way if you were wrong somewhere in making him happy or was lacking something, then he will tell you that. And in return,he will also ask you the same thing, and then you tell him what you felt about his performance in bed.

This way, you will understand each other better.

"Increase Sexual Stamina For a Better Sexual Life"

Sexual Health Secrets Special Report For Men

Dear Friend,

Did You Know that most women have several elaborate fantasies about meeting a man who will give her a hot, wild night of intense lasting passion?

Oh They May Not Openly Admit it, But It's True.

And the only way for her to feel free to express this wild side of her is for you to bring it out in the bedroom with your own physical prowess.

Why do you think new romance novels show up on grocery store shelves every week or every month?

Why does cosmo magazine always seem to have "hot tips" about how to "make your man want top lease you", in almost every issue?Think about it. Women are always craving a powerful eroticexperience, they just need you to bring it out of her.

The Hidden desire that almost all women have - Which Is To Be Lead Through a Powerful, Passionate Experience - has been around for a long time (thousands to milions of years),and it isn't going away anytime soon.

Going all the way back to the early days of humankind, women have always been more attracted to men with high sex drives, because it increases our chances for survival AND adds a higher level of intensity and intimacy to the whole sexual experience.

These days, however,our technological advancements have had a hidden, dark side effect that almost nobody talks about.

Most men have become lazy because machines do most of our survival work for us.
Our modern diets are so filled with quick-fix junk that most have come to believe that we can deprive ourselves of good foods and still function normally.

It isn't until there's a serious problem with our sex drive that we start to wonder.
These poor habits,combined with a massive daily bombardment of misinformation, garbage supplements, prescription drugs with dangerous side effects, useless magazines, and diet fads, have all taken a massive toll on our sex drives.

Because of this, Most men are TERRIBLE at taking care of their health, and are PHYSICALLY UNABLE to please a woman in the way that she so desperately needs.

How many times do you hear about women complaining that their man can only last for a few minutes in the bedroom?

All too often.

And yet how often do you hear about any REAL ANSWERS that truly get to the heart of the solutions tothis problem?

Keep reading, it get's even more interesting.
Here are some quick points to consider take note of.
Fact. Most Women lead lives of quiet desperation, wishing for a man with real sexual prowess to completely ravish her with immense passion for what seems like hours on end.

Fact. Because such a man is so rare, some women have honestly given upon the idea of finding a man with the physical prowess and stamina to have her completely screaming with pleasure. It's a sad reality, but it does not have to be this way.Fact. If you boost up your sexual abilities from a deep level (i'm talking physically and mentally, here), you'll be able to please your woman more powerfully than any other man, no matter what techniques you use.

If You Have A Powerful Sex Drive, Almost Anything You Do In the Bedroom Will Create An Enormously Pleasurable Experience For Her.

Imagine the powerful advantage you will have over other men when your woman runs off to tell all of her friends about the wild nights in bed she had with YOU, and NOT anyone else. Don't worry, Even if the word gets out and this book becomes semi-famous, most guys are simply too lazy to put what they learn into action;

But I know YOU will, and because of this YOU will have the advantage.
Women Love to Gossip and talk to each other about all of the juicy details of their sexual encounters with their boyfriends and husbands.

And something very interesting and "under-the-radar" occurs while these women are talking to each other about these experiences.

It's something that all of the women know is happening, but may not ever admit it, even to each other, because it's almost too taboo.

So What is this dirty littlesecret?

A Woman becomes more sexually attracted to a man whenever one of her friends brags about how good he is in bed.

It's True.

And You can be that man - IF you are willing to solve your own sexual dysfunctions first, and then move on to boosting your sex drive.On that Note, Check This Out....Did you know that it's possible to solve practically any sexual dysfunction, and have an amazing sex life, at any age, using very economical all natural methods that do not involve drugs or surgery?

It's True.And while in cases of serious sexual health problems, there is no suitable replacement for a qualified medical doctor, for most intelligent reasonable people like yourself, a few simple techniques can DRAMATICALLY boost up sexual performance and stamina, all while maintaining sexual health for long term success in relationships.

"Satisfying Your Lust"

If you're like most people, on at least a few occasions you've found yourself in the situation where sex isn't equally fulfilling for both partners. The good news is, this is not an uncommon problem. And the better news is, it's also not incurable. Mutually satisfying sex, the kind that leaves both partners basking in that post-sex glow awash in bonding hormones, is possible. Here are three ways to help make sure you're both getting the best - ahem - bang for your buck.

Consider the problem

First off, if you don't know what the problem is between your sheets (pre-mature ejaculation, not enough foreplay, discomfort or bad body image are some examples) try to isolate it for yourself. The reason behind this is that only by knowing what is wrong can you fix it - and the problem will help to determine your approach.
From there, it's time to think about what a great sex life would entail for you - or at least what you think it would look/be/feel like. Before you can remedy a mediocre routine, you've got to know where to aim. Opening with a goal like, "Honey I'm thinking I might like to try this," might just be the opening you need, which brings us to, tip two.

Talk about it

One of the most common troubles couples have when it comes to a single-sided (or no-sided) sex life is unwillingness to discuss the matter. It's considered embarrassing or improper. But that's silly! Sex is a necessary and vital part of any relationship. And odds are, if it's not working in bed, it's not working someplace else, which is why you need to open your mouth. No pun intended.
The thing is, the topic of sex is as tender as it is natural. You want to be sure your mate doesn't feel criticized, or you're apt to make things even worse. So consider the previous advice. Suggest something you'd like to try that's designed specifically to address the problem. For instance, in the case of premature ejaculation, maybe you want to really take it slow and try a long, drawn out fantasy. Another approach? Ask if your partner wants to know something you'd like. If the answer's yes, once you've told them, ask to know something they'd like in return.

Be willing to compromise

On that note, it's important to remember that mutually satisfying is the goal, thereby you want to think about more than just yourself. How can you please your partner while still getting what you want? Make it your aim to be the best giver you can be as well as the best receiver. Sex is just like everything else, it's dependent on the energy all the participants put into it! Don't settle for dissatisfaction. Sometimes, it's easy to let your own satisfaction go by the wayside once your partner has found theirs. That's one surefire way to guarantee you don't get what you need. Instead, be clear on what you like and want and insist that you get it, however gently you have to do so. It may involve giving your partner some lessons or asking more than once, but you'll find that once you've broken down that barrier and shared, you'll be closer and more turned on by each other, for it. http://www.californiapsychics.com/c/c.aspx?lid=103258">click .................

"The Power of Desire, Belief and Expectation"

How to Get in the Right Mindset toManifest Your Intentions

In the last lesson you learned a technique to help you properly apply the Law of Attraction into your life to draw towards you the things, events and circumstances you seek to build a life you desire. The technique involved spending a few minutes a day in meditation and creative visualization.

Learning the technique is the first step. But how do you approach your goals AFTER you come out of your daily visualization session? What attitudes, feelings and emotions do you need to maintain or create?

To make your intentions come into your life with greater frequency and consistency it's important to understand the three forces of power, those forces are -- desire, belief, and expectation.

Before anything that you want to happen can happen, you have to have a desire that it will happen. You have to believe that it can happen. And you must expect it to happen.

Sounds simple? Perhaps. But there is a lot more to it.
In this lesson we'll explore each force of power in detail and understand how you can apply these forces into your life.

The First Force of Power - DESIRE

Your right to life means your right to have the free and unrestricted use of all things which may be necessary for your physical, mental and spiritual unfolding - in other words, your right to be rich. We have the RIGHT to choose, we have the POWER to choose what we’re going to have … "Ask and it will be given." … Our problem is - we don’t really believe it.

And so we are often content to stay in the current reality. We don't attempt to push for or indeed achieve anything new. In short - we don't DESIRE much more than what we already have.

Let’s think about this in regard to earning money … Although the differences in what you’ve earned over the last 12 months and what you choose to earn over the next 12 months might be great, the change in your personality is usually very small … it’s all a matter of CHOICE – you'll simply change your thought patterns.

"Burt Goldman shares the following story..........."

Consider the story of the disciple who went to his guru one day and asked, “Master, how do I achieve enlightenment?” The wise old guru directed the disciple to the bank of the Ganges River and had him kneel with his head over the water. Then the guru put his hand on the young man’s neck and pushed his head below the surface of the water. After a minute and a half the young disciple was frantic. He pulled and heaved and flailed his arms, but the grip was like iron. He could not get his head back out of the water. After two minutes, when it seemed as though his lungs would burst, the grip was released.
The young man’s head jerked out of the water and he took great gulps of air into his tortured lungs. The guru smiled. “Tell me,” he gently asked, “ what was your greatest desire just then?”
“To breathe,” the young disciple stated emphatically.
“Ah,” the guru said. “When you desire enlightenment to that degree, it shall be yours.”
The first key to attracting good things in your life - is to DESIRE them.
Here are Some Ways to Build and Maintain Desire
Think About How Others Will Benefit
Think about what you can do with the money you earn to benefit the world. Perhaps you're environmentally conscious, pro-peace, care about education for under-privileged kids...think about what you can do with the money you earn to promote and fund these causes.

"Use Reminder Tokens"

Want a new car? Your desire may be high when you first set the goal, but like many people, it may wane as time goes on. This of course, does not help with the Law of Attraction.
To keep the thought of the new car constantly on your mind try creating reminder tokens. Get a set of keys made - generic keys - and carry them in your pocket.

These simple reminders help keep the thought of the new vehicle fully fresh in your mind.
Another common technique is using a mock check. Tear out a check from your bank book. Make a check out to yourself, writing to yourself the amount of money you wish to manifest into your life.

Daily Focus

Yet another way to keep desire strong is by practicing the manifestation process we outlined in Lesson 5. The daily practice of visualizing your goals and feeling the positive emotions associated with them will help keep the desire strong and flowing.

The Second Force of Power - BELIEF

After you have built up your desire to attract something into your life the next step is to strengthen your belief system.

Why is Belief so Important to the Process?

Your thoughts, when directed towards a certain thing - will bring that thing to you. But the reverse also occurs - if you worry and experience anxiety about getting something, in other words the thought of lacking something, this has the effect of pushes it away from you.
This is why belief is so critical. If you do not believe you can attain something, your worries and anxiety will counter any positive thoughts you have of the goal and neutralize the workings of the Law of Attraction.

"The man I want to become,if I BELIEVE myself to be,I will become"
~ Gandhi

Whatever you seek to achieve MUST be within the realm of what you believe to be possible.
Belief is a powerful tool and doctors are still often astounded by what belief can do to a patient's health

In the summer of 1994, a surgeon named J. Bruce Moseley conducted an amazing experiment. Doctors had long been aware of the 'placebo effect' - the idea that you can give a patient a placebo, a fake pill, tell the patient that this pill is real and will cure their pain, cough or sore throat. Sure enough, because the patient believes the pill to be real, they often end up cured.
Mosely wondered just how strong the power of the placebo effect could be. Would it work on something more than pills for minor aches and illnesses? Would it work for more serious medical conditions that involved surgery?

Moseley had 10 patients scheduled for an operation intended to relieve the arthritis pain in their knees. The patients were middle-aged men. All 10 were wheeled into an operating room at the Houston Veterans Affairs Medical Center. They were draped, examined and anesthetized. They went through all the elaborate procedures designed to make them BELEIVE that they were about to go through a serious medical operation. They were then dispatched to the recovery room and the next morning sent home, equipped with crutches and a painkiller.
But there the similarities ended between all 10.
For while two of the men would undergo the standard arthroscopic surgery for their condition -- the scraping and rinsing of the knee joint -- and three would have the rinsing alone, five would have no recognized surgical procedure at all. Their surgery would be a placebo, a make-believe surgery designed to fool the patient.

The result: All 10 patients reported that their arthritis has been considerably healed.
Mosely's experiment was repeated by a team of surgeons in Texas on 180 patients with osteoarthritis in the knee. Two-thirds got the actual surgery. But for a third, the surgeons faked it – they went through the motions of giving a tranquilizer, making three incisions and pretending to do the surgery.

According to the New York Times

"The researchers found patients who underwent the placebo surgery were just as likely to report pain relief as those who received the real procedure. It seems for osteoarthritis patients, the relief is all in patients' minds."

Belief is a powerful thing. And it can be channeled to do more than help you recover from serious illnesses.

Belief, when combined with Desire is a powerful tool to help you use the Law of Attraction to draw to you events and circumstances you wish to bring into your life.

Without Belief, you simply will not be able to properly use the Law of Attraction. The lack of belief will cause thoughts to emerge in your head that are counter to the events you wish to attract.

This means that if you're currently broke, setting a goal to be a billionaire within 5 years may be too tough on your belief system. You may desire a billion dollars, but you may not honestly believe you can acquire it so fast. Without that belief that goal is pointless.

It takes a strong soul to be able to channel so much belief into huge goals. But anyone can TRAIN their belief system to grow and become stronger.

You can start by setting a goal that excites you, that you strongly desire, yet is also something you believe is possible. Going from broke to a billionaire may be too much of a stretch. But aiming to go from being broke to having $10 million in the bank is certainly within the realm of possibility. If you can believe it's possible - it is.

You'll know if the goal you're setting is right based on your inner feelings. If you feel a certain amount of dread or worry - you might be too far away from your current belief system. But if you have positive feelings of excitement and possibility then you're setting the right goal.

The beauty of this process is that once you hit your goal, you boost your belief system. Having hit goal after goal time after time - your belief system will expand more and more. Eventually you may get to a stage where you can believe 100% that one billion dollars is within your grasp.
Fortunately, we humans keep breaking new boundaries in our belief systems every year. In 1952, Roger Bannister, an athlete in England decided that he would set a new world record for running a mile in under 4 minutes. No athlete prior to Bannister had ever run a mile in under 4 minutes. It was a big goal, seen by many to be in the realms of the impossible. Roger Bannister hit his goal in the spring of 1954. He completed a mile in 3 minutes 59 seconds.

But Roger has set more than a world record. He has also raised the realm of possibility for thousands of other runners, many of whom had once thought that running a mile in under 4 minutes was impossible. Just 46 days after Bannister hit his goal, another runner John Landy of Australia ran a mile in 3 minutes and 58 seconds. And within one year, as many as 30 other people had completed the 4 minutes mile.

Roger Bannister showed the world that it was possible - he raised the belief systems of thousands who were inspired by him.

The Law of Attraction did the rest.

Positive Expectations

So you desire something big and you believe it's within your reach, you've already started to get the Law of Attraction working for you.

But here's the third and final step.........

You should now expect what you're asking for to come to you.
Desiring and believing something is possible is not the same as expecting it to occur.
The following example might clarify the difference.

You loaned money to a friend. It's been 3 months and he's yet to repay you. You're asking for the money but you just don't seem to be getting it back.

You certainly DESIRE the money to come back to you.
You do BELIEVE your friend could and is capable of paying you back.
What's missing is expectancy. Because you don't expect him to pay you back you're causing the Law of Attraction to act against your favor. You get stressed, feel angry at his lack of appreciation and integrity. These negative feelings hold you in a state where you're pushing away the money.

Now imagine what would happen if you suddenly got a call from your friend saying that he's come around and has decided to repay the money. He tells you he's mailed you a check using Fedex. To ease your doubts, he faxes you a copy of the check and the Fedex delivery receipt. You now have a changed attitude. You now EXPECT the check to come. As the saying goes, you can relax because "the check is in the mail".

This is what we mean by expectation!

When you've developed a proper degree of expectation, you're able to relax and allow the Law of Attraction to work for you and not against you.

As the late Sam Walton, at one point America's richest man said:

I expect to win. I go into tough challenges always planning to come out victorious. It never occurred to me that I might lose, it was almost as if I had a right to win. Thinking like that often seems to turn into a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Let's provide another example of how this works. This is an actual example from a student of Bob Proctor's. John from New York ran a small business with his wife. They built websites for clients. One day, Andrew, an old friend of John's approached them and asked them to invest some money in a potential business idea. John was intrigued so he signed the papers and made the investment of $12,000.

John thought he was buying into a great idea but in reality the business was unsound and the so-called friend had no intention of returning John's investment. John felt betrayed and cheated. He had just lost $12,000 - he and his wife had been saving up for their future plans.
John had been chasing his friend Andrew for months to no avail. John DESIRED the money. He BELIEVED Andrew could return the money. But he just did NOT EXPECT it to come to him given Andrew's character.

What would John do in a situation like this?

After studying the Science of Getting Rich John said "The answer hit me like a brick. Because I had been CHASING the money, I was placing myself in a state of mind where I simply pushed the money away. I saw myself as someone who had LOST $12,000."
John knew he could not change Andrew's character so he decided to try a different way of earning his money back. He decided "I was going to make up mind to earn $12,000 within a month. I knew I deserved the money. I opened myself up to the possibility of the money coming to me - almost like a gift form the Universe - but through other sources. In my daily meditation - I saw myself receiving a check for $12,000. But I did not care where that check came from. I just desired it, believed it was possible and expected it to come".

John reported that within 3 weeks of changing his mindset he received a pleasant surprise. A particular client commissioned a project that was much larger than normal for John. John had to work 2 days on the project. But his payout was far greater than normal. Coincidently - the payout was EXACTLY $12,000. Prior to this John had never received a check of that size.
Coincidence? Perhaps. But that's exactly what you'll start to notice happening in your life once you begin to apply the Law of Attraction.

Desire, Belief and Expectation --- these are the 3 forces of power than you must learn to harness to allow the Law of Attraction to work for you.

Get in the habit of thinking big and desiring wonderful things for yourself and for your fellow man.

Believe that it's possible. Build your belief system by aiming for bigger and bigger goals each time you accomplish something new.

Finally, expect good things to happen. As you apply the lessons here you'll notice streams of beautiful coincidences pushing you in the directions you seek. Your expectation of good things will grow and blossom.

And when all three are aligned - good things will certainly come to you in numbers and magnitude far greater than you might ever imagine.

Don’t be Afraid of being Sexually Attractive

Off late, I have been greatly criticized because of the way I define sexual confidence and the views I have expressed about sexual desire. This is because my views are in contrast to what the West thinks. As per me, I feel the West thinking of sexuality is still very primitive. It is dangerous too because it makes men and woman do things which they would never do by themselves. Many still keep their sexual desires very secret and make decisions based on a framework laid down thinking that sexual desires are something that can be subjected to such inflexible mechanism.

I have no issues with it, we live in an age where each individual is free to choose.

I keep writing about this parochial way of sexual confidence because I meet men and women across all the strata of society and each of them is grappling with the problem of expressing their sexual desire which is in absolute contradiction to the norms that the society expects all of us to adhere to. So the result is that none of the people are able to express their sexual existence in a healthy and productive manner – which it was truly meant to be.

All of us, men as well as women think of act when we hear the word “sexual”. We have all been conditioned to think like that. All we feel, when we hear anything sexual is that if we let ourselves enjoy what we feel we will be committing the greatest sin for which we will be punished in the most brutal and horrid way.

Another supposedly liberal version of being sexual is all let loose show. You allow yourself to freely express yourself, nothing limits you and you can do anything since you think it is supposed to be like that! This too is a childish way to express sexuality.
I reiterate what I said earlier, every individual in this world has his/her freedom of choice.

I will tell you what the fact is. There have been many books written on sexual confidence and lot of programs have been run to give you technicalities about sex. These are effective but in a very limited manner. They are fruitful for those who think that sexual power and realization of what you truly are not at all linked. For those who just want to calm those jumping hormones these books are fine, but for those who seek much more such books and programs can throw a spanner into their life.

Cultivating and sustaining sexual confidence is not at all complex. It has just been made complex by the world over a period of time.Sexual confidence has nothing to do with how big an organ you have or how well you are at belly dancing or how much your skin you show.

Sexual confidence is above all these physical aspects. Sexual confidence is knowing what you truly are and expressing your sexuality in your own unique style. Human sexuality is composed of a lot many factors like personal values, experiences, sensations, thoughts, emotions, what attracts you and how you desire to express yourself and how you view yourself to be. Sexual confidence is understand each of these factors and their relationship and express them in a way that makes you feel more fulfilled and bring peace and joy to you.

You may be smart and good at striking conversations, but if you want to focus your sexual desire in to your groin area it is not worth hit. Worse, having this kind of attitude is detrimental and it is the worst thing that you could do to you physical, emotional and mental well being.

And for god’s sake don’t tell me the moves – caress the ear, kiss the neck for 2 minutes, next run fingers on the back, move over to the thighs and then turn her on the back and get it done with. This kind of a mechanical and dry run makes me feel that sex is a math puzzle which we all humans are trying with the help of various permutations and combinations.

Sexual desire is perfectly normal. It is not a sin to have sexual desires. We have been created like this. Accept these facts. Every living being on this earth has sexual capabilities. It is nothing unnatural emotion that we are harboring. It is how our whole human kind has cultured into communities and societies. It is just as natural a process as eating, walking, talking etc. The sexual emotions and desires that you feel are an integral part of human existence. It is nothing but love trying to happen. To express such desire is the ultimate bliss, one that vanquishes all fear – the love of how we are linked to the nature.

The issue here is our fear. We fear that we will get transformed into someone we have not yet known. Being powerless is not what we are afraid of. On the contrary, it is the power that we are endowed with which pulls us back.

Just give a thought to what your life would transform to if you come to about how fulfilling and satisfying life is when you live in harmony with your sexual desires. What would the whole experience of living in harmony with your sexual power, wisdom and consciousness be? What would it be when you get all the focus you need without toiling for it?

Do not manipulate your emotions and instead just let them flow in their natural form. Just imagine if you get the gift of telling who is attracted towards you. How would it feel to view yourself in a different light when you are attracted to someone, just because there is a very great part of yours which you can dedicate to that person? Wouldn’t it be great if you master all the techniques inside and outside the bedroom? You will definitely lead a lot better life if you are able to express and share you sexual personality and are always filled with passion and vitality.

But just imagining it won’t help you. Act now to realize it. Show all the inhibitions you have had. You will soon start to realize life both in and out of your sexual desires."I'm very willing to share my desires."