i miss you

I miss the way you walk across

a crowded room, as in my dreams

wearing that french blue silk dress I adore.

I miss the way that very dress

falls down, like a condemned man

as you shrug your shoulders and step out of its shell.

And I miss you on those thick, warm Southern nights.

I miss the way you were there for me

in my loneliness and sorrow

and the taut, familiar passions of our struggle

I miss the angles of your arm

you wrist, your palms, your fingers -

from the incest of their ink to their angels of decision.

And I miss the hungry promise of your touch.

I miss your poems and the creature

you became in the act of making them

and the borders they crossed

and how they made me want to follow

I miss you, you excruciating beauty

your intelligence, your elegance

and your half dreamed voice from older, kinder days.

Missing you !

Having Impact

Excerpt from John 7: 1 -9"Jesus said to them, 'My time has not yet come, but your time is always here. The world cannot hate you, but it hates me because I testify against it that its works are evil.'"Reflection by Anthony B. RobinsonIn John 7 we find Jesus talking with his brothers. They are after him to leave rinky-dink, nothing-ever-happens-here Galilee and head for the big city. Get on up to the big, public festival in Jerusalem if you want to make a difference, they tell him.

Want to have an impact? You'd better work on your visibility. Get yourself where you'll be noticed by more people, noticed by the right people. Jesus responds to their strategy suggestions as follows: "My time has not yet come, but your time is always here. The world cannot hate you, but it hates me because I testify against it that its works are evil." Tough words. What in the world do they mean?Jesus has a different strategy for making an impact. It's not about marketing or visibility or power-centers, it's about being faithful to God's will.

Instead of asking, "How can I get more notice or more attention?" Jesus asks, "What does God want me to do and say?" Instead of putting a finger up to see which way the wind is blowing, Jesus opens his heart to God's will, even if it means saying things people don’t want to hear When you wonder how you can make a difference, remember Jesus' strategy for making an impact: stay centered on God’s will and way. PrayerI confess, Lord, that too often my mind is not set on divine things, but on human things. Today help me to stay more focused on what you want and leave the outcomes up to you. Amen.

Everything Happens For a Reason

It's taken me forever but I've finally found something to discuss, something I'm learning all over again. The topic I'm talking about is Fate.

It's amazing with how fast things for you can change for the worst or the best. Some people believe that they make their own fates and some believe that their fate's are already set in stone. I personally believe in both. Life can be so damaging sometimes, bringing you down to your lowest of lows, or it can bring you light and things will be outstanding for you, and it feels like the world spins in the palm of your hands.

Last year I probably had the best life, and nothing went wrong, everything was perfectly in place, and the world was my playground, and my happiness overflowed, but suddenly it started going down hill, and it completely caught me off guard, and I had no idea what to do or how to fix things, I unfortunately had to take this long winding roller coaster of hell to the point at which I stand now.

Although this whole time I've been positive about things, and looked at the best in everything around me, life has been a drag for me. Every point I'd turn something would go wrong, and it was something that was impossible for me to fix. Within this short amount of time I've lost 2 good friends by the hands of death, and I've become a bit distant from my family, and I've been jobless all because I was accused for something I had nothing to do with, and with the effects of the economy it's been near impossible to find anywhere that's actually even doing any sort of hiring. So here I am in this big world with no doors opened for my benefit, and a bit stressed at that. It's like fate completely turned the table for me.
As I said though I've been completely positive about everything, and I've looked at everything as if it were nothing but a small rough patch that I'll soon pass, and thankfully I finally have passed it all, and I'm back in my safe zone for now, and I finally realize that I had to go through all of those things in order to find out just a little bit more of who I really am, and where I stand in my life. I also realize that being positive was the best thing that I could possibly do, because fate had no intention of leaving me in the hole that was dug for me. I truly believe I had to get through all of those things before fate would let me breathe again, and before it would give me some of its most amazing gifts.

Fate has taught me that life can be rough at times, and that's when you've got to be at your strongest, because it's testing you, and humbling you for great things that are coming your way in the future, and until you're strong, fate will leave you in the spot that you're standing in, and absolutely nothing will change that. Whatever happens, happens for a reason, and although it's hard you have to accept it, and you have to let it be your past, because it'll cloud your future, and bring nothing but sorrow to your heart. My message to everyone is that you're exactly where you're supposed to be, and bad or good, you've got to make the best out of it, and live for you and always keep love in your heart, because without it you'll grow cold towards the world, and the universe, and your life will be so miserable, and things will fail, so don't ever give up! Stay Strong!

Beautiful women in the eyes of Indian men

In India, the fashions, the History, and the culture affirm man's fascination with narrow waist line of a woman. Men in all cultures world wide have lusted women for their hour glass shape involving the narrow waist.

I will limit discussion to the body, not the skin color, or facial features. My teen years were spent in Rajasthan. The hormones were at peak as I used to eye slender young women wearing Choli and Lehanga revealing their bellybutton, carrying water in an earthen pot on their heads.

Fashions
In India women wear a Choli to cover the top. Below the waist, they would wear a long skirt-like Lehanga, Ghagra, or a Petticoat. Saree is wrapped around the petticoat. Choli is a tight fitting short blouse that ends just below the bust. These combination outfits are designed to expose bellybutton and bare waistline for the pleasure of men. Original Choli were open in the back to reveal more skin.

History
The sculptures outside the Ancient temples, and the pictorials in Kamasutra depict woman with narrow waist, firm round breasts and slightly protruding hips. Old Hindu epics such as Mahabharata, and Ramayana mention the narrow waistline of some of the Goddesses to describe their beauty.

Culture
In the olden days, parents chose the brides with narrow waist for their sons. It was believed that narrow wasted brides will bear sons to carry family names. The larger hips will make it easier to fetus during pregnancy. Larger bust will hold plenty of milk to feed the infant. In a way they were right. Estrogen levels effect the size of hips and thighs. Larger hips have higher level of estrogen, and estrogen influences the fertility. Androgen effects the waistline. For the same waist size, a woman with larger hips is more fertile.

Parameterization of Hour glass shape
Beauty Ratio Calculator

The bust, waist, and hips form the so called hour-glass shape. These three characteristics form two ratios: Waist Hip Ratio (WHR), and Waist Bust ratio (WBR). The waist is measured around the narrowest section below the rib cage and just above the bellybutton. Hip circumference is measured around the largest protrusion of the buttocks. The bust circumference is measured around its largest protrusion.

In 1993, Professor Singh set WHR ratio as 0.70. This is a well accepted preference in United States. Other studies have set ideal WBR as 0.76. After analyzing sculptures in Khajuraho and other temples in South India, one may conclude that Indian men prefer slightly more protruding hips and bust. I would suggest the following parameterization:

American preference
WHR = 0.70, WBR = 0.76

Indian preference
WHR = 0.66, WBR = 0.72


Body Mass Index

The BMI reflects the fertility and health of the women. BMI less than 18.5 is underweight and not acceptable for health reasons. Elevated BMI can cause menstruation and fertility problems. In United States, the models are tall and skinny. Indian women are not tall. Indian beauties are neither skinny, nor fat. Indian beauties are slender. For American preference, I suggest optimum BMI of 19. For Indian woman, I would suggest an optimum BMI of 19.5.

Success = Preparation + Opportunity

While you’re waiting, moments are debating on the direction they wish to go,

Are they riding you, are you riding them? These are things that you should know

Are you ready?

While you’re debating, moments are waiting on the wish to go direct,

Do you walk towards or walk away? These choices you must respect

Are you thinking?

While your moments are directed, you’re wishes are waiting, they go the way you debated,

How does it feel, is it fake or real? These impulses are all related

Are you in-tune?

Why wait and debate, while your moments need direction, go with your wishes for a change,

What will you be, are you lost or just free? Define who you are, and be brave

Believe…

"About Faith & Objectivity"

Faith and objectivity will always be at odds. This is because a thing must be verifiable with evidence in and of itself to be objective, at the very least, and while faith can be verified with evidence, it is not in and of itself verifiable by said evidence. That is to say, faith can be backed by evidence, but faith itself implies a gap of evidence that eventually leads to the conclusion one then is able to believe in. Faith is the glue holding something used as evidence to the belief at the end of the connected dots. Faith not only implies belief, but belief as truth, in the face of things that contradict it and show otherwise with equal or more validity. This differs from a belief based on the highest available validity that is subject to learn and admit fault (most importantly admitting fault outside the boundaries of any faith), which is required of objectivity.

While faith can be defined any number of ways, let us not restrict ourselves to any one definition of it, but on the other hand let us not be so semantically open that we allow it to define all of belief, for there is a reason that it differs from other belief based words such as hope. Faith can be based on evidence, it can be based on no evidence at all, and faith can be rational or irrational, faith can be hopeful but not hope itself in that hope does not imply belief, only a wish. One has faith that their evidence, be it the bible, or the Qur'an, or the Talmud, or perhaps the Samhita, is the truth over all the others, this implies that in face of the same basic amount of evidence given by each of the other religions, the person of faith has chosen one absolutely over the others and declares it as truth, absolute truth nonetheless. One has faith that their god died and rose from the dead because a book tells them so. One has faith in 72 virgins awaiting them after death. These are the gaps in evidence that faith accounts for.

Faith is textbook subjectivity. Not only is it an explanative statement for the unknown, be it connecting dots of evidence or not, it is not repeatable or verifiable by any other means than the self through choice. Faith is rooted in the thoughts and interpretations of the self, be they rational and well formed out, even perhaps correct, it matters not for they are by definition interpreted by the self. Ask any person about religion, they will tell you of many gods, each of them, all of them perhaps good well-intentioned people. Ask any Christian about god and they will tell you of many gods, each of them, all of them perhaps good well-intentioned people. There are always idiosyncrasies in belief, most Christians even of particular denominations will pick and choose what they believe in. Now to the opposite side of the spectrum, faith from the fundamentalist, who go by the word presented them, and who lets face it are the more honest of believers and more honest and rational in their faith, because they follow to the letter the evidence they claim to be true. The problem is, be it true or not, still they choose to believe and choose to have faith over any other answer of equal or more validity, and as such they still require faith to declare it as true. The questioning has stopped, belief has set in, and other explanations are nil. Objectivity does not deny critique, nor does it deny complete disproof.

I personally have no need for faith, I use to see it as irrational and had stayed away from it based on such, but after several blogs on the subject I have come to see the many sides of it and am not so nauseated by the thought of it any more. I can see it’s healthy side, faith in oneself, faith in recovering, in persevering, these can be inspirational, beyond just a sense of hope on the matter. All to often though what I see is it’s harmful side, people declaring themselves right and others damned because of ‘x’ difference; such division really. I think it healthy to just keep moving forward and gathering, sharing, welcoming critique. I just want to keep looking for answers, instead of choosing to believe one.

"Lessons In Love"

~LESSONS LEARNED IN LOVE~

Wondering where her life has gone

Was it shattered, useless, empty, wrong?

Now forcing herself to journey on

Through test and fault that seem so long

She doesn't feel this thing called love

And when life comes to push and shove

She'll continue to pray to the Heavens above

While she clings to that which she dreams of

Remembering to walk carefully the line that is thin

Ridding herself of this chaos she's in

Learning to live happily in her own skin

And facing the emptiness that dwells deep within

To live out her dream now, like never before

Taking with her a concept of what this life is for

Searching for meaning; for something much more

Further she swims out away from the shore

She has a faith that will not be shaken

A hope within that cannot be taken

Her soul exhales, must now awaken

So much to gain, so much at stake and...

Though many tears will fall that day

As she musters the courage to walk away

She will not take with her vile dismay

Just lessons learned in love, I pray