Are you losing hope

Are You Losing Hope, Discouraged or Sick & Tired of Facing Life's Problems?

The joy of life comes from the wisdom of counting your blessings, never your troubles. Focus on what you have and maintain a thankful heart.

If you are facing any trouble, don't ask God, why me? Instead, ask "what do You want me to learn?". Then trust God and keep on doing what is right. Don't give up, just grow up!

Thoughts on Life: Be thankful that you don't already have everythingyou desire. If you did, what would there be to look forward to? Be thankful for the difficult times because during those times, you grow. Be thankful for your limitations coz they give you a chance to become better. May you always have a day filled with gratitude.

Life is a matter of perspective, either you complain because roses have thorns or you rejoice because thorns have roses. It all depends on how you look at it.

Sometimes God breaks our spirit to save our soul. Sometimes He break sour heart to make us whole. Sometime He sends us pain so we can bestrong. Sometimes He sends us failure so we can be humble.

Sometimes He send us illness so we can take better care of ourselves. Sometimes He takes everything away from us so we can learn the value of everything we have.

Look at the babies sleeping, it makes us realize how fragile life is. Look at the shooting star blazing, it makes us realize how temporarylife is. Look at the sun rising, it makes us realize how beautiful life is. Look at a person dying, it makes us realize how important life is.

Life is beautiful in its fragility, important on itstranscience. Live life to the fullest. Laugh, love and be grateful.

If you have food, clothing and a home, you are richer than the 75% ofthe world's population. If you have some money in the bank, you ar ebeing among the top 8% of the world's wealthy.

If you wake up healthy this morning, you are more blessed than the 1 Million people who will not survive this week.

If you have exprience peace and freedom, you are ahead of the 500 Million people in the world. And if you can read these messages, you are more blessed than the 1 Billion people who cannot even read at all.

Like birds, let's leave behind what we don't need to carry - grudges,sadness, pain, fear and regrets. Fly light, life is beautiful. Have a blessed day.

Whenever you don't understand what's happening in your life, you just have to close your eyes, take a deep breath and say "Lord I know it'sYour plan, I put my trust in Your hands".

Has life been good? Let God hear your "Thank you". Has it been bad? Let Him hear you say "I trust in You". Has it been unfair? Shhhh....just have Faith.

Always remember the 5 simple rules to be happy 1-Free your heart from anger, 2-Free your mind from worries, 3-Live simply, 4-Give more, and5-Expect less

3 reasons why laughing is good for your health: 1-Your Heart - laughingmakes your blood pressure good while increasing the amount of oxygencarried in your blood. 2-Your lungs - a deep level - laughing lowers level of the stress hormones,cortisol-reducing tension.

"Be A Guy Magnet Effortless"

Six ways to make your Guy loves you forever

It's interesting and full of useful information that every girl should embrace it as a good knowledge. You may be surprised at the things guys really can’t resist about women, and some of them are the very qualities women fear will drive men away—from letting a curse word loose to leaving all kinds of makeup near his bathroom sink. Here’s why these habits and others actually win a man over.

1. He loves that you indulge at dinnertime.Guys love girls who love to eat—not girls who say they aren’t hungry and then pick at their date’s food all night. Paul, 30, who lives in Boston, thinks that food may be the reason he fell in love with his fiancée: “When we first started dating, I thought it might be awkward if I wanted greasy food like wings—I figured she’d think it was fattening or unhealthy.

Women I’d dated in the past only wanted to go out for salad or sushi. But she was enthusiastic about eating all kinds of things with me. I loved that easygoing attitude of hers.” Aside from showing that you’re not high-maintenance or neurotic about your weight, that kind of unabashed enthusiasm also tends to translate into other areas—including the bedroom. “A woman with a healthy appetite for food tends to have a healthy appetite on all levels, and sex is absolutely a part of that,” explains Barton Goldsmith, Ph.D., author of Emotional Fitness for Couples: 10 Minutes a Day to a Better Relationship.

2. He loves your occasional obscenities.You may worry that it’s not ladylike, but occasionally letting a curse escape your lips at an unexpected moment can be a major turn-on. “Hearing a woman use profanity out of context gives a guy a shock of sexual adrenaline,” explains Ian Kerner, Ph.D., author of She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman and co-host of Discovery Health’s Love on the Rocks. “Men like women who can be tough and assertive, and as long as she doesn’t take the talk too far, it’s a positive thing.”

3. He loves that you aren’t a neat freak.Believe it or not, guys find the proliferation of hair products, accessories and unidentified stuff strewn about your apartment oddly sexy. “I love that my wife makes a bigger mess than I do,” says Ziad, 31, of Durham, NC. “When she cooks, food ends up all over the place. It shows that she’s carefree, and it reminds me to enjoy the moment rather than worrying about the consequences.”

This laid-back mind-set also carries over into your weekend wardrobe. “Guys love a woman who’s not trying too hard,” explains Dr. Kerner. “Most men think a pair of boxer shorts and a ratty old T-shirt around the house is your sexiest look.” So don’t spend hours choosing the perfect date-night outfit or getting your place in House Beautiful–shape, because men love you just as you are—in your comfortable, slightly sloppy glory.

4. He loves your extra padding.

Sure, you’ve heard that men love women with curves, but how about those extra pounds you’ve been trying to sweat off at the gym? There’s a good chance that your guy loves them, too. Just ask 26-year-old Nick: “My girlfriend exercises regularly, but I think the little pudginess in her thighs is sexy because it shows she’s not perfect.”

Sure, your extra padding may make men feel a little better about their own beer bellies, but there’s also a biological reason why men like this. Psychologists at the University of TX determined that men were most attracted to women with hourglass figures — specifically, women whose waists were 60 to 80 percent smaller than their hips — regardless of their weight. They theorize that men unconsciously seek this body type because it signals that a woman is able to procreate.

5. He’s fascinated by your knowledge of medieval tapestries.Or whatever it is that gets you all hot and bothered—whether or not he shares the same interests. “It’s not about knowing facts—it’s about being passionate about something,” says romance columnist Mira Kirshenbaum, author of The Weekend Marriage. “These are things that are important to her, not just stuff meant to impress a guy.”

This can be passion for a subject as seemingly obscure as agricultural practices of the Mayans or as popular as Spanish as a second language. He may not quite get it and he may not want to have all-night discussions about it, but he definitely appreciates the fact that you’re a smart, interesting woman who thinks for herself and doesn’t mold her interests to match those of her man.

Your interests also fuel what Kerner calls the process of self-expansion. “The more you expand as a person,” he explains, “the more the relationship expands.”

6. He loves a good head rub from you.Don’t get me wrong—men love it when you grope their erogenous zones. But that’s not the only type of touch they crave. Adam, 28, of Roanoke, VA, confesses: “I love how my wife rubs my head at night.” Sweet, yes, but it also feels oh-so-good: Home to hundreds of nerve endings, the scalp is an often-neglected zone.

And light touches anywhere can achieve a similar effect, since they cause his body to produce vasopressin, a feel-good relaxation hormone that also promotes bonding. Another positive side effect? Initiating any kind of physical contact sends your man the message that you want him just as much as he wants you—and that you truly care about him.

Why Do People Get Married?

Once, quite a lifetime ago it seems, I was voted one of myspace's Most Romantic Women in a blog contest held by the lovely Ms. B (wasn't it?). I tied with my once dear friend, and whom I will always call friend no matter what, "Moon Goddess Chandra."

When I was listed in that category, I couldn't understand how. Then people began to point out some of the romantic things I did but I still questioned it. It was a nice little perk and then I did realize, I DID act kind of romantic.

Yes, I can be romantic. I can be loving, kind, heart-felt, sincere, robustly, passionately romantic, but mostly, I end up being logical. I simply like answers based on grounded information. Unless of course it's metaphysical then I'm cool with that too.

So … while continuing to do Byron Katie's Work on the three words, as I was driven home in the cab tonight I was overcome with panic because my brain was completely empty of an answer to this question:

Why do people get married?

Once upon a time there was a reason right? And as a young girl, I was raised in the era where you married so your children would be "legitimate." Yah I blew that one. I was a trailblazer. Got comfortable with it too because there was no child who could have been wanted more except by another mother who felt the same.

By then I was taking care of 98% of the majority of the mature responsible issues in the relationship, household and our lives. No need to get married. In the end, no need to have him around because coupled with his lump on a log status, he was abusive. And a drug addict. And an alcoholic. And unemployed. A real groom to be.

Sadly, several years before when I truly wanted to be married to him, I prayed silently before my God that I vowed to love and honor him and that I saw him as my husband and no piece of paper could make it more so. Turns out I was just a nice piece of nawgahide with a money clip attached. Credit denied. Move along.

After he was gone I found myself single and dating and raising my son. I had less problems in my life when I knew I had no one at home to put my thumb in Chinese thumb screws everytime a responsible decision had to be made. Bills were paid. Gas never got shut off again. Electric stayed on. Food in the house.

Child, although having autism and other comorbid conditions, well, I was on top of that too as best I could be during that time frame since the assistance wasn't as available then as it is now. I was happy. Marriage didn't enter my mind. Why would it? I was doing it all.

Then comes "live in number 2." No words of love had been spoken between us until three months after he moved in. Our relationship was two years old by then. I was still young enough, and romantic enough to believe that marriage meant something. That it was the "ultimate payoff" of love.

And when he mentioned it, I actually allowed a little spark to come to life inside of me. And thought ... well what does that mean? I bet it will be amazing to share someone's name, to have someone love me so much. I supported his dreams to go back over the road. I did what I THOUGHT a good wifey did. Unfortunately, I learned that "living together" doesn't mean wifey or hubby to others.

I prayed that God would show me the way. I prayed that He would help me understand where this relationship was going since it seemed like 2 was going one way and I was … just there and definitely not walking the same path because I could never quite catch up with him or where his mind was.

I loved him with my entire heart, and once again prayed to God, asking him to bless our union and look with favor on us and please let this become a healthy balanced love relationship, not this detached arrangement it seemed to have become.

Let him see me, notice me and realize that his pain was my pain and his joy was my joy and vice versa. I even asked him to come back to church and find God with me again. I knew where He lived in me. It just seemed like He was missing in.

2. I wanted him to feel that beauty and know we could have love and binding through Him. What an ass I was. Turns out I guess all I turned out to be was the venting panel he needed to release all his animosity toward his ex. Because I'm pretty sure he wasn't seeing me or the vision I thought we'd both talked about so early on. When we loved one another.

No marriage there even though he knew that I was of a generation where I still felt like women were looked on as loose and hoes if they lived with a man without being married. Besides, I wanted another baby, and he wouldn't have one without being married. He held the ring, and wasn't giving it to me.

The same issues were reoccurring without a resolution and it really didn't seem like he was seeing what I was doing to make anything better. And besides, when you can't understand someone's child has autism that's just effed up. Ciao.

Once again I went back into my safe, protected, mind-frame. I'm single. Doin it all alone, which for some reason didn't feel so different than when I was in my relationships. No biggie. I'm mighty good at it by now. Been doing it for 20+ years.

When I was a young girl, until my first molestation and abuse, I believed marriage meant two people loved one another, had fun together, might even be friends, got married, bought a house, had babies together, and lived a quiet mediocre life with nice little family vacations planned.

Sure things happened but the people loved each other and got through it together. I THRIVED on that vision. Then the innocence died. But the old programming of marriage still stuck there for some reason.

I texted my friend Peabody tonight. I rarely text him simple questions like what is 1+1? Tonight's question was, "Why do people get married?" He responded, "You never ask the simple ones do you?" I replied I thought he'd be disappointed if I did lol.

And after getting home, I was looking for Pastor Jesse because I planned to write to him asking the same question but in more detail, after trying to work through answers with my beloved Michael. We're moving in that direction and there is no doubt I love him but i have questions that needs answers.

"Why do people get married? What benefits do they get from it? What are the perks that one gets from being a twosome instead of singleton? And it can't just be financial. I've had my heart broken twice realizing that the financial combining of homes, while it may make good financial sense, does NOT a marriage or good relationship make. Does it? When I was younger it meant children and a future filled with memories.

Now I have a beautiful son (and now I'm going through Empty Nest) and had hoped I'd have more children and while one day there will most likely be grandchildren, I need to know WHY people get married now? Women are just as capable if not more so of taking care of themselves now while single. Men don't do too bad of a job either while they remain single.

I vowed twice before God that I would always cherish the person, always allow room for him and I to grow, work to be a partnership and ladies and gentlemen, I've been b^mf>cked because they sure didn't feel the same way about me. God I was so naive. And stupid. I had studied ancient religions and other culture's ceremonies for marriage and to me, it didn't have to be before a priest but it had to be a sanctified and sacred moment!

How did people get to the point where living together just meant roommate with benefits? How did it get to the point where it meant, "Yah this works for now but eh, you're Ms./Mr. Right Now but I don't see it lasting forever"?

How did living with someone in the confines of a home, that's supposed to be place of love turned into sex in exchange for help paying the bills?

Where did the love go? Where did the future visions and prospects go? And if there are those that make living together work, and I do believe they can and do, what purpose does that staying together bring?

What purpose does marriage serve? I'll take any and all answers at this point. I have yet (until recently) to have any healthy relationship that could show me the benefits of two people being together, or what benefits being married to that person would offer.

Especially considering how well I took care of myself during relationships and after and what they had to offer that I couldn't give myself.

Drop in and give me your thoughts. I'm hoping Pastor Jesse and Peabody write back to me. We already know I have a hell of a time with visions of the future, hopes, dreams or goals, so for me, marriage is just like … a period at the end of a sentence.

The beauty and romance of it has been ruined for me over the years. Help me see what GOOD marriages or partnerships give to each other. I love Michael and I know over time he can undo most of what I learned over the years.

He is in a place where he is stuck helping ME to learn what a healthy relationship looks like, or how people who are truly partners act toward each other because frankly, I have NO CLUE. None.

Whatsoever. I've done it all on my own for so very long and I've already realized all the love I thought I was sharing was simply me giving it away with little sentiment in return.

How can two people know that they should come together and how do they create a life together with common dreams? Visions? Goals? And whatever ELSE the beauties of marriage holds that after 23 freakin years I have no IDEA ABOUT!

I'll be posting some of my research when I get it together. Love is all well and good, but it takes more than love to make a marriage work that much HAS to be true doesn't it?

AND as a bonus, if you don't know, just type I don't know. OR leave me a joke or a comic or a nice alcohol beverage recipe. It should be time for a BUTB soon.

"How to handle being stalked?"

Merriam-Webster's third definition as a transitive verb applies here:

"To pursue obsessively and to the point of harrassment."

According to the on-line "Ask a Lawyer Now" (Just Ask) (http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3Lmxhdy5qcmFuay5vcmc=),

"Stalking is the willful and malicious act of following, viewing, harassing, communicating with, or moving threateningly toward another person. Stalking behaviors may be expressed by written and verbal communications, unsolicited and unrecognized claims of romantic involvement on the part of the victims, obsessive surveillance, harassment, loitering, and following that may produce intense fear and psychological distress to the victim. Stalkers use telephone calls, conventional and electronic mail, and vandalism to communicate these obsessional interests."

That sounds pretty comprehensive to me.

There have been stalkers who have made headlines because they have stalked celebrities -- Mark David Chapman who ultimately killed John Lennon; Margaret Ray who stalked David Letterman and broke into his house many times; John Hinkley, Jr. who ended up shooting President Reagan to impress Jodi Foster.

(http://www.msplinks.com/MDFodHRwOi8vd3d3LmFwc3Byb3RlY3Rpb24uY29t)

That being said, I strongly suspect that the majority of stalkers we never hear about on tv or radio or the newspaper. They are the ones who stalk the likes of you and me.

It poses a very real danger and too often leads to fatal consequences. Time and time again I hear stories about law enforcement and others in position of authority failing to take such complaints seriously and then the unthinkable happens.

I believe that, just as there has been a "push" to educate people about what constitutes sexual harassment in the workplace and elsewhere, there needs to be such education in the area of what constitutes stalking. And it needs to begin at an early age. And what it means when someone says, "NO."

Just one more thing. There are red flags. If an individual is suspected of having tendencies toward stalking, there certainly needs to be earlier intervention so that this individual can be given the necessary help before psychological and/or physical harm is done to anyone.

"Fuel Your Emotions"

YOUR CAR TYRE : AFFECTION

Your car rides on tires and is going nowhere without them. Your relationship with your woman rides on affection. You don't leave the tires off your car and just put them on when you want to go somewhere. They are always on and ready to roll. Similarly, affection should always be a part of time spent with the lady in your life. Hugs, gentle pats on the back, an arm around her shoulder, a little kiss on her forehead, holding hands, and saying "I love you" are signs of affection which should be sprinkled liberally throughout the week, using at least one a day. (You may think telling her you love her once, at the beginning of the relationship or marriage, settles that issue from then on. But you can't fill your car's tires just once, and count on them to never go flat, and a smart man knows to tell his woman often that he loves her, before their relationship goes flat.)

As with the necessity to rotate and balance your car's tires, it is also necessary sometimes to vary the routine with your woman. Before the usual goodbye peck on the cheek one morning, try holding her shoulders, looking into her eyes, pausing dramatically and telling her you love her! And any time the ride seems bumpy in your relationship, remember to air up the affection.

ATTENTION IS HER FUEL!Just like a car,NO GAS, NO GO!

"Guide On Parenting"

Real Love in Parenting

Parenting is one of the most important responsibilities we will ever take upon us, and yet what training do we receive for this awesome task? In school we learn algebra, history, and English, but not how to raise happy and responsible children.

Our lack of preparation is reflected in the condition of our children. They often sulk and glare at us. They fail to carry out the responsibilities we give them. They don’t do their homework. They argue and fight with one another. They make a great deal of noise, often with the generous assistance of amplifiers and speakers. They bring these problems and attitudes to school, where they’re disruptive and irresponsible.

And that’s just the beginning:

41% of ninth-grade students reported drinking alcohol in the past month.
Almost one-fourth of ninth graders reported binge drinking (five or more drinks on one occasion) in the past month.

60% of high-school seniors in some regions are binge-drinkers.
In the last thirty years, the incidence of girls who have had sex by age 15 has gone up by 500%.

The incidence for boys has more than doubled.
21% of 9th graders have had 4+ sexual partners.
1/4 of all adolescents contract a sexually transmitted disease before they graduate from high school.

4 out of every 10 girls in the U.S. will become pregnant at least once while in their teens. 80% of these pregnancies are unintended.

Anger, rebellion, drinking, drug use, and indiscriminate sex are not all separate problems, although we have often approached them in that way. These problems are symptoms of a growing unhappiness among our children.

We know it’s growing because in the 1950s a standardized psychological profile was performed on several thousand children, measuring anxiety, which is a strong indication of unhappiness.

Then they repeated the test in our day and found that the average American child now experiences more anxiety than the average child psychiatric patient did in the 50s. One way to interpret that study would be to say that the average American child now would have qualified as insane in the 50s.

With their behavior—with many behaviors—our children are screaming that something is missing from their lives. As parents we are often absolutely baffled about how to help these confused and troubled children—and about how to prevent these problems in the first place.
So what’s missing? What do our children need that they are obviously not getting? What every child needs most in order to be happy is to feel loved. But not just any kind of love will do.

Children can be happy only when they feel loved unconditionally, when they have enough Real Love.

Real Love is caring about the happiness of another person without any thought for what we might get for ourselves. It’s not Real Love when you do what I want and I like you. That’s relatively worthless; that’s earning or buying love. It’s Real Love when you make mistakes and inconvenience me, but I’m not disappointed or angry.

Regrettably, most children don’t get much Real Love. When children are clean, quiet, and obedient, they often experience the signs of our approval—smiles, gentle tones, kind words—but they also see what happens when they’re loud, disobedient, and otherwise inconvenient.

The smiles and kind words tend to disappear immediately, and from this behavior they can only learn this lesson: “When you’re good I love you, but when you’re not I don’t.” This is the worst wound a child can receive, and the effects are far-reaching.

All of our children’s behaviors that we find exasperating—anger, defiance, fighting with their siblings, withdrawal, lying, lack of responsibility, and so on—are nothing more than reactions to the emptiness and fear in their lives, nothing more than reactions to not feeling a sufficient supply of the one thing—Real Love—that is as essential to their emotional health as air, water, and food are to their physical well being.

Read the book Real Love in Parenting and take advantage of your free membership in RealLove.com, where you will learn the principles that will enable you to raise children who are far more loving, responsible, and, above all, happy.

You will learn the Nine Principles of Effective Parenting:

"Profound, provocative, written with great wisdom and compassion. After reading this book, I will never feel confused about my children again."

"I was at my wits' end. I did not know how to help my children. But now I do. Real Love in Parenting has given me everything I was missing as a parent."

The First PrincipleMore than anything else, my child needs to feel loved.
The Second PrincipleWhen my child behaves badly, he or she doesn’t feel loved.
The Third PrincipleWhen I’m angry, I’m wrong
The Fourth PrincipleI can’t give what I don’t have: I must find Real Love for myself
The Fifth PrincipleMy child needs to be loved and taught
The Sixth PrincipleAfter my child has been loved and taught,he or she needs to be loved and taught again
The Seventh PrincipleThe Law of Choice
The Eighth PrincipleHappiness comes from being loving
The Ninth PrincipleHappiness comes from being responsible

You will also learn the answers to the following questions about parenting:

What are the real reasons our children often behave badly?
What is the real reason parents become angry and frustrated with children?
How do parents unwittingly cause in children the behaviors they dislike most?
How can we completely eliminate the destructive force of anger from parenting?
How can we as parents find the Real Love our children need?
Why is it foolish for us to feel guilty for the mistakes we’ve made as parents?
How can we teach children to become responsible, without nagging and manipulation?
How can we teach children to almost effortlessly resolve conflicts between one another (arguments, resentments, racism, and so on)?
How can parenting become consistently effective and enjoyable?

"I can live without you but i don't want to live without you,MY AIR"

I ' M Y O U R S

You are the air I need to breathe

The river of life inside of me

You are the half that made me whole

You are the anchor of my soul

And you are strong when I am weak

You are the words when I can't speak

You never fail to see me through

That's the love

I found in you

You are my shelter from the storm

You are the road that leads me home

And baby with you here face to face

Oh I know I found my place

And you are strong when I am weak

You are the words when I can't speak

You never fail to see me through

That's the love I found in you

And once in every life

You find the one that's right

And when you say forever it's true

That's the love I found in you

You are strong when I am weak

You are the words when I can't speak

You never fail to see me through

That's the love I found in you

That's the love, love I found in you