Showing posts with label relationship. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationship. Show all posts

Sunday, January 18, 2009

"Strange Love"

A Life With You

IF I COULD SPEND MY LIFE WITH YOU, I'D TREAT YOU LIKE A QUEEN

BECAUSE YOU ARE THE SWEETEST GIRL THAT I HAVE EVER SEEN

I'D PAMPER YOU AND SPOIL YOU AND PLACE YOU ON A THRONE

AND SHOW YOU THE VERY SWEETEST LOVE THAT YOU HAVE EVER KNOWN

THE DAY WE MET STARTED LIKE ALL THE REST

LITTLE DID I KNOW IT WOULD BE THE VERY BEST

BUT ONCE WE CHATTED I KNEW RIGHT FROM THE START

I HAD FINALLY MET THE GIRL WHO WOULD STEAL AWAY MY HEART

HONEY THAT GIRL COULD ONLY BE ONE, COULD ONLY BE YOU

I KNEW AT ONCE YOUR WERE THE ONE TO WHO I WOULD BE TRUE

AS DAYS GO BY, I KNOW IT MORE AND MORE

I HAVE COME TO CHERISH YOU AND WITH MY HEART ADORE

THIS FEELING WILL ONLY GROW FOR YOU WITH EVERY BREATH I TAKE

I LOVE YOU SO AND YOUR SWEET LOVE I NEVER WILL FORSAKE

YOU INSPIRE ME LIKE NO ONE HAS AND NO ONE EVER WILL

TO LOVE YOU SO UNTIL MY HEART GOES COMPLETELY STILL

BUT EVEN THEN WHEN I AM GONE AND THIS EARTH I DEPART

I WILL TAKE YOUR PRECIOUS LOVE WITH ME AND KEEP IT IN MY HEART

I WILL LOVE YOU FOR ALL ETERNITY

I AM ALWAYS YOURS

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

"What Man Truly Needs"

The Inner Needs of Man


Author: P.Rajagopalachari(Published in "Principles of Sahaj Marg, Set I. Pages 56-64")

Man has been defined in various ways. He has been called a social animal. In a cosmic sense, he is a universe in himself when compared to an atom, and in turn is but an atom when compared to the universe. He is stated to stand mid-point between the atom and the universe. But a simple description could be that man is a complex of physical and emotional needs.

All living beings have needs which must be fulfilled if they are to survive. The basic needs are the very obvious ones such as food, shelter, protection from the environment, a mate, etc. When man existed at the level of the animal, the needs were basic to his existence and were comparatively easily fulfilled, even though his existence was, in what is usually called today, a primitive state. Nevertheless, primitive man would appear to have been a much happier and more contented person than modern man, perhaps for the very simple reason that there was no confusion in his appraisal of his needs, and therefore his approach to their satisfaction could be direct and immediate. Certainly primitive man did not have all the traumas, psychoses, neuroses and the whole gamut of psychological illnesses that appear to accompany human life throughout the span of its existence today.

How has it come about that simple primitive man could be happy in such adverse environmental conditions, while facing extreme conditions of life where every moment of survival was a victory over his environment and his foes, whereas modern man, with all the conveniences and appurtenances of life, a life which has been made so easy to live that very often the minimum of physical activity is all that is needed, and where almost everything that he needs is at hand, or can be easily acquired without much personal effort or danger-how is it that in such an existence we find man unable to live in peace either with himself or with his surroundings .




The aim of life, since the dawn of this century, appears to have become nothing less than an affluent existence made possible by the gigantic and incomparable advances in science, which in turn made possible revolutionary developments in technology. One of the great economists of the West has indeed termed modern society as the affluent society and paralleling this growth in affluence, we find a development below the surface of more misery than history would appear to indicate as prevalent in any past era. There were many dark periods in human history filled with much suffering arising out of lack of physical needs, strife, bigotry, but all these led or would appear to have led to nothing more than physical suffering. But the suffering today has been shifted in plane to the mental level, and the greatest suffering of the affluent is at this level. By comparison, the less developed societies of the Orient would appear to enjoy better mental health even today, though their physical levels of existence may very often appear shocking to the Western eye. What is the reason for this almost inexplicable state of affairs? I would venture to suggest that perhaps our needs and the way we approach the satisfaction of those needs is at least one factor contributing to the madness of modern existence.

There is a significant differentiation between needs and wants. Needs are legitimate, and man can legitimately expect such needs to be satisfied. Wants, on the other hand, are creations of man from his knowledge of the external world. Needs arise from inside whereas wants arise from outside. If needs were all that are to be fulfilled, people and governments would have a very easy time doing so. But it is precisely the ever-increasing wants of today's society and individuals that are found to be difficult and often well-nigh impossible of satisfaction. Indeed it would be correct to go a step further and say that today's orientation in society is towards enlarging wants and even towards creating more and more wants to keep the wheels of industry spinning. Our society may therefore be termed a society dedicated primarily to the creation of wants, which later it sets out to satisfy. Needs are limited, therefore easily satisfied, and once satisfied, man is at rest. Wants, on the other hand, have no limit, and each want satisfied gives rise to the next want based on the prior satisfaction of the earlier one.

Therefore, it is a vicious spiral mounting in its demands, and developing in the individual and society a frenzied craving for its satisfaction, but the goal ever recedes from the grasp of the individual. This is one of the main reasons for the psychological condition of today's individual. Society is after all composed of individuals and can reflect nothing but the sum total of individual attitudes and aspirations.


Analyzing our needs, the most apparent one of course is the physical need for food and shelter. Food must be such as will not only be palatable but also will refresh and add strength to the body. This is, or should be, the primary consideration. Naturally, the body has to be strengthened by opposing it to external forces of nature, and the simplest way is physical exercise. Therefore, there are two aspects to physical existence, one is the provision of fuel for the inside, and the other is the pitting of the body against the external world to develop its strength, ability and other associated physical characteristics.


At the mental level, applying the same formula, what the mind needs is food for its existence, and solid effort in overcoming mental obstacles for its development. Man must devote adequate time to the study of such literature as will enrich his mind, and the literature should be of such quality and quantity as to make him throw his entire mental equipment into the study of such works. Unfortunately today we find that what most people read is the lowest type of literature such as the yellow journals, cheap romances, gory criminal fiction and so on. That such minds do not develop at all beyond the juvenile level is therefore no surprise. The curricula of most educational institutions do not appear to take this into adequate consideration from the point of view of the needs of the student.

Thirdly, coming to the emotional level of man, here again what emotional sustenance man receives is very often of the wrong type. Love is one of the fundamental aspects of man's existence, and in the fulfillment of this very vital emotional need such irrelevant media as romantic literature, cinemas and casual liaisons are indulged in, discovering too late that none of these can satisfy the pent up emotion where what is needed is a steady and canalized outlet for the emotional power of man which rarely needs, physical expression. It is a well-recognized fact that the physical expression of love must succeed the mental development of love or emotional development of love. But in modern society things are topsy-turvy, with very tragic consequences. The latest manifestation of such an unfulfilled need is the fast spreading drug habit combined with, or preceded by, a loose set of moral values.

Perhaps I may add that, as far as the emotional life of man is concerned, religions were expected, in a very fundamental measure, to make available an object of adoration or love which could elevate human emotional life to sublime levels far above the ordinary human level. The present day mental condition of most people would appear to indicate that religions, too, have not been able to play their part. Here again what man solidly needs is something, which he can venerate and adore, but all that is offered in most religions is an idol or other representational form of the deity. And the only way he is taught of approaching such an object of adoration is the ritualistic way which is largely outmoded and which, to the mind of modern man, very often appears as mere child's play.

We all know that while the non-satisfaction of purely physical needs may at worst impair the physical organization in some way or the other, albeit not very seriously, the non-satisfaction of emotional needs is much more serious. In the field of emotion, love is dominant, supported by, and evoking in its turn, such sentiments as faith, hope, charity, courage, etc. If this basic emotional instinct is unfulfilled, such associated mental-physical complexes cannot manifest themselves. It is well known that where there is no love there can rarely be courage, and I would request you here not to confuse courage with sheer bravado or the front-line necessity to kill. Similarly, where there is no love, there can be no faith, charity or chastity and, therefore, existence devoid of love is an empty existence.

Love must grow and embrace more and more within its orbit of expression. Love for one's wife must enlarge into a deep love for the family resulting from such love. Familial love must grow to include neighbors, for, after all, if a neighbor is sick, notwithstanding the marvels of modern medicine, we are likely to be the next victims; if the neighbor is poor, his poverty affects us; if he is the victim of gangsters and hoodlum attacks, we are sure to feel the repercussions. So our neighbor's well being is a matter of immediate concern to us. Thus, slowly, as love matures, it must widen in scope until ultimately it envelops the entire universe within its sublime embrace. Spiritual Masters says that the only way of approaching the Ultimate is through love.

What we all need is a god, or if you prefer to call it so, a Universal Power or anything like that, but what we need is such an entity as we can approach with love and reverence. This would appear to be a spiritual need, higher than the other needs. Even an atheist would agree that there are times in his life when he has, perhaps unconsciously, cried out to God for succor, only proving that the need for God is universal in its prevalence. When we negate such a need, we do so artificially without knowledge of the frightful consequences of such repudiation. The time has, therefore, come to re-establish in our minds the truth that God is necessary to us, whether He is visible or invisible. Whether He can manifest himself or not is not the point. What He is must ever remain a mystery because what is known has no mystery about it, and only the unknown is mysterious.

As the old English proverb would have it, "Familiarity breeds contempt," and it is perhaps for this reason that God chooses to remain invisible and inaccessible! But this does not mean that God's existence and love cannot be experienced, God cannot be seen or known in the conventional sense, but His presence can be experienced if the approach is in the right way.How to bring God into our lives is the question. The first need of course is to recognize that we need Him. This paramount inner need, a universal need in the minds of all men everywhere, is inextinguishable. When we recognize this we are ready to accept spiritual help. We naturally look for spiritual schools, books and yoga centers. Yoga means union. The union is the ultimate union of man and his Creator, and no lesser union is implied. And This is the greatest need of man!

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

How to get your man to happily commit to you


Knowing what a man wants and being aware of his apprehensions about commitment is the first step toward understanding what it takes to give a man what he wants from a relationship with you. When given a choice most people do what they want and what they believe is in their best interest.

A man will not commit to a relationship unless he is convinced he will get what he wants now, with reasonable expectations he will continue to do so in the future. Fortunately for women what men want includes a love interest, trust, emotional support and commitment, some of the same things women want.

So finding the way to a man’s heart might be easier than you think. A word of caution though; this does not relate to women who are fully aware that their chances of getting their man to commit are slim to none, such as:


1. Women who remained too long in relationships with men who do not have and never had any intentions to commit to them.
2. Relationships of convenience where the woman feels trapped, but is afraid to bring up the subject of commitment for fear of loosing the man forever.
3. The woman who gets the feeling the man is ready to commit possibly with someone else, but not to her.


These suggestions refer to relationships where men want to commit but are genuinely fearful. Pay little attention to the previously well-publicized strategies that promise to motivate your man to commit to you; they do not work and men are weary of them.

Anyway, if you have to coerce a man to commit to you, you are definitely with the wrong man. A man would not commit to a relationship unless he is ready. And sometimes the way he perceives you can give him that little psychological push he may need to help him to make up his mind.


Nine ways to win your man’s heart so he will want to commit to you

1.Be reasonably certain he is the kind of man with whom you would like to spend the rest of your life. The thought of commitment should not enter your mind unless you are convinced he is the one for you. You have to know him well enough to determine: He is able to commit; He possesses many of the qualities you’ve always looked for in a man; you can’t help but to respect and admire him; He has already passed your test for honesty, integrity and consideration for others, and you must be reasonably certain he is falling in love with you.

2.Always be who you are. And don’t be afraid to express yourself the way you’re accustomed to.This is probably the most important quality men look for in a woman. Ninety-nine percent of men in numerous surveys said so, and women whose character changed after marriage ranked number one on the list of causes for marriage break ups. Resist the urge to try to make a man feel important by conforming and not voicing your true opinions or laughing at his jokes when they are not funny. If for no other reason, consider the possibility he may be testing you

3.Show him you’re independent.Men are weary of women who sit back and wait for their men to fill every aspect of their lives. Let him know although you welcome his input in many ways, you are perfectly capable of doing things without him; in fact sometimes you prefer to do things on your own. For example you may want to see a certain movie, but he’s too busy to go with you. Instead of sulking, cheerfully tell him you’ll go by yourself, and do it.


Until he commits to you, do not make major changes in your life with a view of accommodating him. If you had plans to purchase your new condominium go ahead as if he was not in the picture. It may seem wise to hold off on your plans pending a commitment from him. Don’t, he may get the impression you’re not as independent as he thought. If you mention your plans to him do so only for the purpose of information and not as a means of forcing him to make a decision to commit to you. The purpose here is to genuinely show him that your life goes on with or without him.

4.Show him you are a kind and loving person.As surprising as it may seem, a man needs someone who loves him and whom he could love in return. This may seem obvious to many, but the more women are becoming empowered by their independence the more intolerant they are becoming with men who are slow to adapt. Men see these women as insensitive and most likely incapable of love. So in her own way a woman needs to show a man that although she is capable of going it alone, she has a burning desire to share love with the man in her life.

5.Show him you’re interested in him for who he is and not what he can do for you.I’ve asked men what would be the one thing they would like to know most about a woman before they marry her. Overwhelmingly men said “to be certain that the woman loved them for themselves and not as a means to an end. This is understandable.

No man likes to feel that a woman chose him because he is a good provider, a model citizen or a potentially good father; all of these things are also important to men. But a man is happier when he knows that his woman chooses him because he is her best friend; someone she would want by her side no matter what his situation may be.

So how do you let him know you want him primarily for the person he is?Show interest in his life, his likes and dislikes and his values. Talk about his career, but pay more attention of how personally rewarding it is for him instead of how economically lucrative it may be. Tell him what attracted you to him in the first place, e.g. “There was something about the way you smile”

6.Do not play games to get him to pursue you.Men are fully aware of the games some women play to get their attention. They may even be intrigued by the challenge and do whatever it takes to win you but may never commit to you.

Flirting with other guys to make him jealous or manipulating him so that he chases after you may seem to work for a while. But how could he trust you if he thinks you’re a manipulator. Even if he is fascinated by you, a man would be afraid to commit to a woman if he has the slightest doubt about her trustworthiness.

7.Let him know you have no intention of changing him.If a man feels committing to a woman will drastically change his lifestyle he will aggressively resist commitment even when he thinks he loves her. You don’t have to fit in every part of his life so even if there are some areas of incompatibility let him understand that you can compromise.

Let him know you have no objection to him spending a night watching football with his friends instead of being with you. Don’t make him feel that he has to make the best of his time now because his life would change (of course for the better) once you become a couple.

8.Always maintain your femininity with special emphasis on physical appearance.Men like women who can fit in with their friends; women who they feel can be almost like one of the boys. So having a great sense of humor, socializing without getting bogged down with too much detail makes you extremely desirable, but be careful; Men also want women who are particular about their femininity which includes being kind, loving, gentle and always conscious of their physical appearance.

So being one of the boys should not be confused with looking like them. And even though it may seem like men are not overly concerned with your looks, never let your guard down. Now we’re not talking catwalk model material here, but we expect you to look as if you’ve taken time with your appearance. This means using clothing that bring out your best qualities, maintain proper posture, (your mother was right) tastefully manicured hands and feet and regular use of mouthwash especially if you smoke or drink beer.

9. Don’t rush or appear to rush the relationship.You may think he is taking too long to make up his mind about you. Relax! This may be a good thing; maybe he wants to be certain he’s making a sound decision. Don’t give him the impression you’re impatient, cheerfully carry on with your normal routine. Don’t suggest he takes you to meet his parents or invite him to meet yours, unless he asks, it’s better to let him make such decisions on his own.

Remember your goal is to provide him with the information he needs to make up his mind and at the same time give him all the space he requires while doing so. And if you believe he’s truly the man for you and followed the suggestions outlined in this article, you would not have to wait very long.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Friendship is fragile

Is friendship fragile? It’s a really difficult question, please, try to think it over...any ideas?...



On the one hand we should reply NO...friendship is bond for life...we have friends all over the world...all of them are busy...as we are...married...as most of us are...but we still have strong friendship for life...just not see or talk to each other each day...This is mobile society these days, so we can be together in many many different ways...Yes?...For sure.


But on the other hand running through our life we inevitably pass over a lot of changes...and as result we leave behind...give up...lose something...Mostly we regard friendship as a kind of pastime...Stop here and reply the question “When proposely will you have spare time?”...Indeed...We have just calls from time to time...e-mails even more seldom...what to talk about meeting...We should admit and realize that friendships are getting less and less close, geographically or emotionally, and most friendships have gone forever. Very few are strong enough to make us wish for a second chance.



There are times when all of us look closely at a friendship and realize that it just isn't working..and when friendship falters we are rarely equipped for the aftershock. Close friends, after all, often become like siblings - some "closer than a brother." As we make friends feeling soul-mates, like-minded people...FREE of obligations and engagements. But losing a close friend is not at all like losing a family member. We tend not to sorrow the loss of a friend; there is no memorial service for a shattered friendship. Most people don't seek shoulders to cry on to grieve the loss of friends like they do the loss of a family member or a romantic relationship. They don't go to counselors either to heal the relationship or to cope with the loss. Indeed, despite the evident high value so many people put on making friends, there is a surprising lack of focus in popular culture on the processes and feelings at work when friendships end.

Don’t we need to repair lost friendship? Or it’s just so easy to resolve?...and we just do not need any advices...


How much can you expect from a friend? Why does this question arise? Because your answer is a pretty good barometer of how well your friendships will weather relational storms. Let's face it, we don't ask much of casual friendships, the kind in which you invite each other to a party once a year. But we demand more from friendships characterized by strong feelings and a shared history. We expect friendships to be easier, more automatic than they actually are.

Think about your childhood friendships. They often set the tone for all the rest. You never "worked" on the friendships, they just happened. For example, your first best friend lived just two houses down from you and you literally met in the sandbox at school. The bond was almost instant. He/she liked vanilla ice-cream and building sand castles. So did you. What's to discuss? It was the beginning of a beautiful friendship—until your family moved to another town and you found another sandbox.

Just a few short years later, sandbox bliss was replaced by the tormented, possessive feelings of a third-grade relationship where blatant betrayal reared its head. That's when you learned that your new best friend was playing at another classmate's house after school. Sound familiar? It happens to nearly all of us.

There may be worse betrayals in store, but probably none is more influential than the sudden fickleness of an elementary-school friend who has dropped us for someone more popular. “It shouldn't be that way”, we think to ourselves. But alas it is. It's the lesson our friendships continually teach us, a lesson we don't want to learn: Friendships are FRAGILE.

The seeming ease of friendships—compared to romantic and family relationships (more likely loaded with emotional baggage)—is part of the reason we value friendships so much. Relatively speaking, friendships just happen...So...as much easy it happens as easy it falls through???...

Well...the main point here is FREEDOM...It’s your will, your decision, your action...Attemt to build a bridge...to reconnect and make things right...call your lost friend...tell him/ her “I don’t know what happened between us...but I want to apologize”...sincerity always caughts off guard...apologize both for past insensitivities and laugh and laugh at how comical it all seems in retrospect...It’ll be cleansing...you have a good chance...TRY IT...

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

How to Spice Up Your Married Life


Improve Your Marriage

Improve your marriage by fostering a better relationship with your partner. This alone might tell you that it takes some effort as well as time to improve your marriage. After all, marriage is a lifelong contract and making it work means nurturing and keeping the relationship between the husband and wife always alive and well.

Making a marriage last takes more than just love alone. Other factors also come into play when it comes to making marriage count. Communication is just one important factor that can help improve your marriage. Keeping the communication lines always open is important for married couples so that they can express what they really feel. And it is not just communicating by expressing what you feel.

In trying to improve your marriage, you also need to have a good ear to listen to your partner. And in the same manner, your partner should learn to listen to you. It is all a matter of give and take. That is what effective communication is all about.

Another tip to improve your relationship with your better half is by trying to keep the fire of intimacy burning. Having a great deal of intimacy in a relationship is an indication that the attraction and love is still there. On the other hand, if intimacy has diminished a great deal, it is a sign of an impending failure in the relationship.

When you wish to improve your marriage, you also have to find time to spend with each other. What would become of any relationship if partners don't see eye to eye? Although absence may make the heart grow fonder at times, prolonged absence may also be a surefire way of making the heart lose interest in the relationship. Make it a point to enjoy and spend time with each other's company.

Another important ingredient to a good marriage is humor. This may sound funny (pardon the pun) but humor can really help a marriage. Laughter can easily help break the ice. Cracking a joke can also help calm a volatile situation. If you know how to share a laugh with your better half, then you know that you can get through anything.

If you want your marriage to last, you have to place it on top of your priorities. You must learn to put it above anything else in your life. It takes effort on your part to improve your marriage. It may seem hard. But it is all worth it.

Friday, January 4, 2008

Sincerity is all what it takes to gain the Trust of others

"True Sincerity is proving yourself that you are worth without asking & expecting anything in return"


Sincerity is generally understood to be truth in word and act. One who means what he says is a sincere person. One who does not mean what he says is not a sincere man, and is perhaps even a hypocrite. Because of its purity the term ‘sincerity’ has endeared itself to us. We love sincere people. We also love to be known as sincere people.

As man is constituted, each part of his being – mind, emotions, etc. – is independent and is not necessarily influenced by the growth of any other part. If we could integrate the different parts of our personality, every part would then be raised to the level of the central growth. A person is integrated if his emotions are rational, social and gentlemanly to the same extent as his mind. His sincerity is partial if it is limited to the mind and external manners.
By ‘sincere’ we understand that the man acts according to his conscience. If he acts according to the dictates of his conscience, we accept his sincerity. In that case, he is sincere to himself. In society this is acceptable as sincerity, but this may be wrong. Suppose an administrator feels that according to his sincere conscience the clerk has to be treated as a second-class citizen, he may be sincere but the world outside may not accept it. He may be sincere but his own conscience may be undeveloped. It is not enough to act according to the conscience; the conscience must also be cultured and noble. Being cultured is a social concept. Being noble is a moral concept. Both are good in themselves, as sufficient guides to men in society. But there is a deeper reference, and that is the inner being, the soul. Sincerity means to act according to the dictates of the inner divine, to obey the Divine Will. Any other reference like morality, society, conscience etc. is not sufficiently high.

There are also different levels of sincerity according to the different parts of the being. There is mental sincerity, vital sincerity and the sincerity of the body. Mental sincerity means to understand and accept in the mind the highest ideals of the inner Divine. The mind has a personality of its own, its own beliefs, preferences, traditions, habits, etc. A person may want to dedicate himself to a very high ideal but the mind may not be able to accept. The nerves, otherwise known as ‘vital’, also have their own personality. The body has an equally powerful one, perhaps more powerful. Each of them have developed on their own and retain their individuality.

Of all the levels of sincerity, mental sincerity is the easiest. Let us examine it here. If we leave aside blatantly insincere people such as liars, clever crooks, etc. and consider only those who consider themselves to be sincere, and really examine their beliefs, several facets of sincerity will emerge. One can sincerely believe in a false idea. Many sincere people have a strong belief even though the belief is not true. This belief stands in the way of their progress. Some of these may be:

1) my country’s culture is the best in the world;
2) because a person is my friend, he must be trusted by everyone, etc. Sincerity should also be rational and intelligent and not foolish. It is not enough to be sincere, you must also be right.

A certain wrong belief about ourselves can have tragic consequences for our growth. An insincere employee is perhaps able, by his cleverness, to convince his boss that he is easily the best in the world and indispensable to the institution. Sometimes he comes to believe himself in his ‘ability’. If he is a sensitive man, capable of further progress in life, this belief acts like a black cover over his soul and prevents him from any progress.

Sometimes people wrongly believe, in all sincerity, that their spouse is the cause of all their problems. But the problems they encounter in life, the blocks to their success, are really centered in themselves.

These people lose a golden opportunity for progress. Their false view of themselves allows them to even commit outrages on the society. It does not matter they fool others, but it is a pity they fool themselves.

We can call them sincerely insincere people. Most of us have such a streak in one thing or another. Unless and until we come forward to shed this aspect of sincere insincerity, the inner light will not shine forth.

It is open to everyone to make his sincerity greater and greater everyday. One can start by being guided by his conscience and becoming conscientious. One bases his sincerity of right information and socially acceptable intelligence, not sincere foolishness. Horizontally one can extend the domain of his sincerity to other similar areas of life and existence. Vertically he can raise the quality of sincerity by extending it to events of greater significance. Sincerity made perfect at the level of conscience, extended horizontally to cover all our life activities and vertically to act in important events of our life will be a sincerity of power and value.

If what is of value to you inwardly is also recognised by the society as valuable in their eyes, your sincerity reaches a second peak in the mountain chain of human progress.

Morality is a great thing for society. If one raises his own sincerity to fulfil the moral requirements of honesty, veracity, purity, etc., etc. it will result in another crown for the inner jewel of sincerity.

Morality is great, conscience is great, society is great. All are good in themselves. In a spiritual endeavour, they are stepping stones, not the final crown. For the final crown, the inner Divine is the sole reference. One must be sincere to the inner Divine and try to express it in speech, emotions and acts.

There is a test for sincerity and its level of attainments. One who has achieved mental sincerity will not complain about anything. One whose vital sincerity is complete will not know any sadness of any kind. The man who has achieved sincerity at the physical level will not meet with failures of any kind in his work.

One who achieves sincerity at the level of the Spirit will be able to evoke it successfully in others at all three levels, according to the intensity of his own attainment and the purity of the other receiving human being.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Friendship - Who Is A True Friend


We all have friends. A lot gets talked about friendships. Everyone wants a true friend, and many of us believe that we have a friend who can be called a true friend. What kind of relations do friends share? When can we call a friend a true friend, and when can our friends take us as their true friend. After a romantic relationship, friendships are the most important relationships we can have. Though all of us have family and distant family, most of us rely on friends for advice, comfort and inspiration. How do we define a relation that can be called as one of true friendship?
The very first sign of a very good friend, not necessarily a true friend is that we are not worried about courtesies. You will call your friend at any hour and talk without any thought of time in your mind. Similarly, whenever you need support, you will call a very good friend and ask him/her to help you out. They expect the same from you. Another important trait of such relations is that we are not much worried about exposing ourselves. We speak about everything in our mind without worrying about what our friends will think. We are sure that they will take our talk in the spirit it was made. We are unguarded and open with friends in our talk.
A true friend is a little more than a very good friend. A true friend will support you even if it hurts his/her own interest. A true friend will understand your motives and needs and will be with you without any analysis or criticism. A true friend will come forward to help without any request and be with us in need without showing it or expecting anything in return. With a true friend, you can be sure that you will get help to the extent possible by him/her. Nothing will remain unturned. A mother is a true friend of her children. If we share such relations with an adult we can say that we are true friends.
A true friend makes no excuses of having work or appointments or anything but will be with you whenever you need him/her. In your hour of desperation, a true friend will support you even if the whole world opposes you. A true friend is not an opportunist. A true friend means to have someone who is like mother, as I said earlier. Instead of having hundreds of good friends, if you have a true friend, treat yourself lucky. If you can also become a true friend of someone, you will be blessed, because it is much easier for all of us to expect but very difficult to give. Be a true friend yourself first.

Are you the Type of Woman that Men Desire?


Figuring out what men really desire is never easy, since men come in different variations. However, regardless of what category a man falls in, there are standard things that every man is looking for in a woman. Are you the type of woman that men dream about being with? We all want to be an object of desire- the kind of woman that men talk about, dream about and long to be with. We all want to be chased and admired by men and to be appreciated, respected and admired for our existence, appearance, personality and accomplishments.
So what do men really desire in a woman and are you that woman? Well, the first and most important thing to remember is to:

Be Real- be who you really are, rather than try to be what you think you should be or who you think people want you to be. It is easy to sense a real person from an artificial one and one of the main turn offs for a man is a woman who is not herself and gives off a fake vibe.

Have Confidence: Nothing is more attractive to a man than a woman who is confident and feels comfortable and happy in her skin. A woman who feels good about herself is a woman most likely with a good head on her shoulders, rational, focused and has good direction in life. If a woman does not have confidence in herself, then a man feels and sees no reason to have confidence in either and he will not want to invest his time and effort in a woman he will have to baby sit emotionally all the time.

Dress Fashionably: Wearing the most expensive apparel is not the most important thing to a man, but it is important that a woman keep up with her appearances. A woman who dresses sharply comes off as a woman who is successful and who treats herself with love and respect and therefore a man will not want to do less for her either- he will love and respect you too. So be sure to keep yourself updated with fashion and keep yourself well groomed. This will not only draw men to you, but you will also feel good about yourself- which is the first priority before you please anyone else! And remember, dress sexy, but classy as well- and always leave something to the imagination.

Express Intellect - Being desirable to a man is not just about having a pretty face or shapely figure. A woman with intelligence is important to and a man wants to be with a woman who will have something to talk about and who will teach him new things, just as he will teach you new things. Everyone is unique and has their own personal talents and areas of higher intelligence than others- so be sure to express that side of yourself to prove that you do have the whole package- an attractive appearance along with other intellectual surprises. Share your hobbies, share things you have learned through your life experiences and show what he has been missing out on before he met you!

Be Sweet and Feminine - Okay, today women are more independent and career oriented, but that does not mean we should have to give up and forget our feminine roots. Women are delicate creatures after all- we are sweet and giving and it is important for a man to see these qualities in a woman. It is not weak to show a man that you are sweet and care taking- after all, this is the type of woman a man dreams coming home to- someone who will lovingly welcome him home with a sweet feminine smile and take care of him. Never lose your special feminine roots- show him your sweet and romantic side.

Tell him what you want - It is understandable that you want a man who will treat you beautifully without you having to give him directions- and you should never lower your standards when it comes to this. However, you also have to remember that men cannot read minds and let’s face- we women are emotionally unpredictable creatures and are not always easy to read. Men love it when a woman has the strength and confidence to tell him what she wants. Men want to please women, sp do not be afraid to open up and let him know what it is important to you.

Stay Glamorous - This does not mean that you should walk on eggshells and worry about your looks all the time. You should feel secure enough in your relationship to know that even when you are not made up, your man will still adore you and will not look at other women. However, this does not mean you should let yourself go and not care about the things that were once important to you. Relationship usually start going downhill when one or both partners stop caring about the little things, such as dressing up for each other, little romantic gestures and so on. So, remember the little things and always keep your self-confidence in tune by taking care of yourself- and your partner will automatically keep admiring you!

Like Your Body - Men love a woman who loves her body. A woman who walks around feeling good about her body and knowing that her body is beautiful is incredibly sexy to a man and make him curious and eager to get to know that woman. So be sure to build your physical confidence and focus on bringing out your best features. Nobody is prefect- everyone has flaws, but that does not mean that you should advertise your flaws. Get to know yourself and find your strong physical points and bring them out for the world to see and admire. If there are parts of your body that you believe could use some help, then do something about rather than complain.

Thursday, December 27, 2007

70 Romantic Phrases That Make Men Fall Deeper In Love




Romantic communication is just one of the proven communication tools you can use to make your man fall madly in love and fulfill your heart's romantic desires. There is a lot of love-creating power in the romantic words that come out of your mouth.

This article will reveals 70 romantic phrases you can start using today to make your man fall madly in love.

You may not say these things phrased exactly the way I have written them, but if you want your man to be addicted to your love, you must speak to him with words that will melt the walls he has build around his heart.

Feel free to use any of the romantic phrases that best suit your communication style.

1. All I care about is being with you forever.
2. All the gold and diamond in the world are not enough to buy the love I have for you.
3. God created you for just for me.
4. I am addicted to your love.
5. I am crazy about you.
6. I cannot live without you.
7. I cannot stop thinking about you.
8. I did not mean to hurt your feelings.
9. I do not want to wake up from this wonderful dream with you.
10. I feel safe when I am with you.
11. I get lost in ecstasy when you make love to me.
12. I have finally discovered true love - you.
13. I love talking to you.
14. I love the way you make love to me.
15. I miss your hugs and kisses when we are apart.
16. I thank God for the day he brought you into my life.
17. I want to spend forever with you.
18. I will give anything to be with you.
19. I will give you my heart, my body, and my soul.
20. I will go with you to the ends of the world as long as you keep loving me.
21. I will rather be broke than trade your love for a million dollars.
22. I will travel a thousand miles to be with you.
23. I wish God had brought you to me sooner.
24. If anything happens to you, I will go crazy.
25. If I could I would make love to you a thousand times.
26. If I had to live life over again, I would live it with you.
27. If loving you is a sin, then let me be guilty.
28. If our love is blind, then I never want it to see the light of day.
29. Life without you will be like going to sleep and never having sweet dreams.
30. Loving you feels like heaven.
31. Loving you has made life even sweeter.
32. Loving you has made my life so full of joy and happiness.
33. My heart cries when we are apart.
34. You are my love, my heart, and my life.
35. No man has loved me the way you love me.
36. Nothing will ever stop me from loving you.
37. Ooh sweetie, you are so good to me.
38. Your warm hugs and your tender kisses are more precious than gold.
39. Talking to you is like sipping the most delicious wine - I want it to last forever.
40. The times we spend together are like precious gems that money cannot buy.
41. Time stops when you hold me in your arms.
42. When I am with you, my troubles seem to melt away.
43. When I look at you I see a man that I find irresistible.
44. Words are not enough to express how much I love you.
45. You are my prince.
46. You are my soul mate.
47. You are the most important person in my life.
48. You are the music that makes my heart sing.
49. You are the only man I ever want in my life.
50. You are the other half that makes me feel whole.
51. You are the perfect man for me.
52. You are the sweetest man I know.
53. You bring nothing but love, peace, joy, and happiness to my soul.
54. You bring so much joy and happiness to my life.
55. You love me gently.
56. You make me feel like a woman.
57. You make me feel so good I want to kiss you from your head to your toe.
58. You make me want you more each day.
59. You treat me like a princess and I love you with all my heart.
60. Your are the kindest man I know.
61. Your caring words touch the deepest part of me.
62. Your hugs and kisses melt my heart like chocolate ice cream on a warm summer day.
63. Your kisses are like warm chocolate on a cold winter night.
64. Your kisses are so good I feel tingles all over.
65. Your love is like a solid rock that will never break.
66. Your love is so good I can't get away even if I wanted to.
67. Your love warms my heart like the glow of a candle light in a midsummer night's dream.
68. Your loving whispers in a moon-lit night are like soothing wine, they put me in the mood.
69. Your smile is so comforting it makes my tears go away.
70. Your gentle touch sends chills up and down my spine.

Making your Romantic Dreams come True







Are you having the romantic life you have always wanted…in your imagination? Welcome to the club that has many members who feel and live exactly the way you do! Romance is always simple and carefree when it is being acted out in our imaginations. We can come up with the most unbelievable and breathtaking ideas and play scenes that make the best romantic movies look amateur.

The only catch to all this however, is that they are developed in our fantasies and stay there, without ever actually taking place in our real lives. Why is that? Why is it so easy for us to fantasize about the most amazing romances, but can never find such romances that really exist?

Does it just not happen? Is there no such thing?
No, there is no such thing as a romantic dream come true…until you create its existence. That’s right, you carry the key that will open the magical door to making all of your romantic dreams come true.


What did you expect to find out? That someday an invisible wand will be waved over you, miraculously bringing you and your meant to be honey together? Well, if that is what you are counting on and waiting for, prepare to keep on waiting! Do not get the wrong idea here, of course there are situations where two people meet and have an instant connection, but things do not just stop there.

Many make a mistake in believing that once they found someone they make a great connection with, everything else will fall into place perfectly and all of their romantic fantasies will come true automatically.

If you want your fantasies to become a reality, then you must introduce them to reality. Our partners are not mind readers, yet we tend to believe they are, expecting them to act out and the things we picture them doing in our imaginations.

You do not necessarily have to ask your partner to act a certain way or do a certain thing, but you can introduce your romantic ideas by starting to act them out yourself. This will paint a clear picture for your partner, helping him or her see what kind of romantic personality you have, and what you enjoy.

You will also learn more about your partner, because you will see their response to your romantic suggestions, which is why is it extremely important that you do this at the beginning of your dating process, or in the beginning of your relationship. If you do not, you could very well be setting yourself up for deep disappointment.

Romantic Dreams come true when you make an effort to never settle or anything else than what your genuine expectations are from a person. This does not mean you should never compromise however, for nobody will every perfect, including yourself, so keep in mind that there will be times where you will need to find a middle ground with your lover.

Not settling for less is meant more on an obvious level. For example, if your romantic dream is to find a partner who loves long walks on the beach and going out for fancy dining and intimate picnics, then do not even bother getting seriously involved with a person who loves staying at home all the time or going out to loud parties with his or her friends. You will only be frustrated later.

Many people choose to get involved with a person who never really fulfilled their romantic expectations from the start, but feel that things will change as their relationship proceeds. This is a mistake often made and one you should avoid making if you ever wish to live the romance of your dreams.

Though people can be unpredictable, a persons hobbies and lifestyle can usually be determined in the early stages of dating…after about between 3 and 6 dates. You will be able to observe from your dates if a person carries the qualities you are in search for by paying attention to where they choose to take you on your dates, the way they speak to you, as well as all the other little things that are important to you.


It is important that you are also open and honest about your hobbies, lifestyle and romantic qualities so that your date also starts to learn who you really are as a person and can also decided whether or not they feel you are someone they wish to continue dating. If you do not wish to be misled, then do not mislead others either!


Living the romantic life of your dreams is indeed very possible, but requires time, patience and most importantly, being honest with others and yourself about who you really are and what you really want. Accomplishing true romance can only happen when you express yourself freely and confidently.


Remember, no one can read your mind and there will be no magical wand that will wave over you. Fate will play a part in who you end up committing to and settling down with, but according for fate to do so, you have to help it out by showing it exactly what it is you are looking for. Fate is like a dating service in a way- in order for it to help you find the right person, you need to give it an honest description of what you are looking for and what you are also not interested it.

Once you have done so, stick to it without settling for something you know you will not be 100% satisfied with. In time, you will be living your romantic dream come true with a person who feels the same and the two of you will have the wonderful relationship you have been searching for.

Friday, November 30, 2007

To know that i could bring hope to someones life brings me joy & happiness




"To anyone who needs advice with their problems & want to know the real "YOU" i'd like to help in a way that could help you improve how you see things that are presently going in your life.To tell honestly,i do not have any educational background in psychology or in any related course but i'm confident enough to say that with my own experiences in life i could be a great help to anyone who needs it.I'm very willing & happy to help,just send me your questions.I'm going to make time to answer."


Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Forgiveness the divine way to Eternal Happiness


Forgiveness-The divine asset


What according to you makes a relationship last a lifetime? Is it only love and understanding. Well it takes lot more than that to make a relationship work. And one of the most important aspect of it is the ability to forgive your partner. It takes a lot of courage to forgive and one who learns to forgive learns to love and make a relationship work. It is said "To err is human and to forgive is divine". How true it is. For only forgiveness can make you understand what love really is.When you forgive you do it for you, not for the other. Forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself. It is not something you do for someone else. But it is something you do for yourself and in a way you give yourself peace of mind and it makes you a good person. Refusing to forgive by holding on to the anger, resentment and a sense of betrayal can make your own life miserable. There is nothing so bad that cannot be forgiven. So don't hold on to the anger and resentment but let go of it and you will be much happier in life.Healthy love relationship is not possible without forgiveness! If you have been hurt in your love relationship then it is not possible to enter into fresh relationships unless you have learnt to forgive. You cannot have a loving and rewarding relationship with anyone else, much less yourself, if you continue to hold on to things that happened in the past. Regardless of the situation, making peace with past love partners, your parents, children, your boss or anyone who you think may have "done you wrong" is the only way to improve your chances of a "healthy" relationship with yourself or anyone else for that matter! It is not possible to truly be present and available to a new relationship until you heal the hurt and upsets of the past. You can never live in the present and create a new and exciting future for yourself and your love partner if you always stay stuck in the past. Remember there is no future in the past and all the love awaits you in the future. Forgive and forget is a myth. You may never forget but you can choose to forgive and move on. With time the hurt and the pain will fade. Forgiveness cleanses your system of the poison that will surely worsen and cause sufferings and continued misery if not released. Don't poison your mind with resentment and anger. You cannot take the poison and expect someone else to die. Those who have wronged you will go on with their life and you will be the only one to continue to suffer. So learn to forgive and move on with your life. Remember you deserve to be happy.

Romantic Souls on Earth

Relationship guidelines


In any relationship what is important is understanding and trust. It is important to build and maintain a FRIENDSHIP in your relationship and that you give your partner the benefit of the doubt when times are tough... namely TRUST! Learn to understand each other, know each other and know what makes your partner happy.What Men Need to Know: The Woman's Point of View 1. The most important thing is being sensitive and romantic in your words and action. Please don't fake your emotions and say things you don't mean.2. Please listen to what she is saying. Most of the men never try to know what a woman wants because they never listen attentively. Don't take your girl for granted. 3. DO build her trust by being faithful and truthful, and always "being there." 4. Spend time together, cuddling, kissing and learn to enjoy foreplay and learn about her body and erogenous zones instead of jumping to the real thing.
5. Never expect or demand sex.What Women Need to know: The Man's Point of View 1. Do take the initiative instead of expecting him to be the one to initiative first always.2. Try to accept him without judgment. 3. If you are still dating don't expect him to profess his love for you so soon.4. DON'T push him into a commitment or an exclusive relationship. 5. Don't take everything personally. 6. Don't always expect him to apologies to you. 7. DO let him withdraw once in awhile; understand his need to be alone, to take things slowly, or to have a night out with the guys.It is quite normal to have up's and down's in a relationship but how you argue when in a relationship can determine if you have a relationship that falls apart or lasts.Things to avoid when arguing or fighting with your relationship partner: 1. Criticism, 2. Contempt, 3. Defensiveness and stonewalling (withdrawing from talking)Good things to use in an argument:1. Using humor to break tension in an argument. 2. Expressions of affection for your partner. 3. Acknowledge your partners point of view.