Friday, April 24, 2009

"How To Secure Your Relationship'

Do you feel uncertain about the future of your relationship?

Would you feel more confident in your relationship if you knew exactly what to say and do so thatyour man would ALWAYS feel that being with you and staying in a committed relationship with you was worth it, no matter what kind of challenges you're having?Challenges like tough financial times, stress,temptations from other women, and disagreements?

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Do you sometimes wish that men could just be moreHONEST with you?Do you feel discouraged by dating because the menyou meet actually LIE about what they want fromdating, what their background is, what they do fora living and sometimes even lie about whether ornot they're AVAILABLE?

To where sometimes you end up involved with a man who is already seriously dating another woman, orworse - is married?


Not good.If these are situations that you run into a little more than you'd like, then keep reading because in this topic I'm about to reveal the "MAGIC ATTITUDE" that actually inspires a man to be completely up front and honest with you about such things as:--

If he's looking for something serious or casual-- If he's seeing other people -- If you're the kind of woman he's drawn to -- If he's ready to"settle down" or not As a matter of fact, with this magic attitude, you may be able to get a man to reveal a lot more than he would ever reveal on his own, without prompting, and the ADDED BENEFIT of this is tha the will feel more "connected" with you because he'll feel he can tell you just about ANYTHING.

He'll feel more attracted to you because he'll feel more understood and appreciated by you.This is why I call this attitude "magic." It not only inspires honesty from a man, it makes him feel
more connected to you at the same time.Nice.I

If you're single and dating right now, this mindset or attitude can actually help you qualify the right man and avoid Mr. Wrong as early in thedating process as possible, perhaps even before youmeet in person for the first time (if you'reonline dating).And if you're in a relationship, it can help you get to the bottom of what he's thinking and feeling, so you can know why he's with drawing, ifhe's open to taking things to the "next level," orwhat's holding him back from fully committing to you.But first, there's a fundamental question that seems to bother a lot of women.

Why does this even have to be an issue, anyway?

Why can't a guy just be up-front and honest with you?Why, for example, is it so hard for a man to tell you why he's not calling as often or why he stopped asking you out, especially when he seemed so "into you" in the beginning?

You go out on a few dates with a guy, and you think everything is going great.then he stops calling. He doesn't respond to your emails ortexts. It's like he's dropped off the face of the earth. Maybe you even realized that he was a nice enough guy, but you didn't know him well enough yet to fall in love or anything.But still.you wish you could at least hear WHY he stopped calling, stopped asking you out, stoppedr esponding to your messages.You just wish he could be HONEST with you.

It's no big deal - you can handle it. Right?Hmmm.perhaps, but that's not how HE may be seeing things.

WHY MEN WILL LIE TO YOU


Imagine this scenario:You're on a first or second date with a man and it's going really well.You're laughing, you're having a great conversation and you seem to have a lot in common, it's almost scary how similar your attitudes are about certain things.You feel an intense "chemistry" between you.



He's staring at you with that "look" that tells you he is very attracted to you.He even talks about places he'd like to take you to someday.You are almost positive that this is the beginning of something meaningful with this guy.But a day or two goes by after the date and you don't hear from him. Then a week, then two weeks.You send him a message, "Haven't heard from you in a while. How are you?"But he doesn't respond. You never hear from him again. You beat yourself up, analyzing everything you did and said on the dates to see if maybe you accidentally put him off.

Months later, you find out the truth from someone else. During the time he was dating you, he was also dating another woman, and was now getting more "serious" with her.You feel confused and disappointed, and a bitannoyed that he didn't just tell you the TRUTH about what was going on.Why didn't he tell you the truth - either before,during or after he went on a date with you?

The truth would have been a whole lot better than days or weeks WONDERING and beating yourself upover nothing. Right? Of course it would.So why does a man lie to you? Why does he avoid telling you the truth about a situation?The answer is simple.A man will lie to you because he hates confrontation.He FEARS your emotional response. He fears your rejection of him. He fears that HE won't be ableto "handle" your response.He's imagining that you're going to cry, scream,be disappointed, argue, or complain.

He fears being put on the spot or "attacked."Understand - I'm not saying you would do any ofthose things.I'm just telling you what that guy - who maybe doesn't know you all that well yet - is thinking.You may be a cool cucumber. Totally able tomaturely handle whatever he tells you.It doesn't matter - somewhere in his past, there was a woman or two who did in fact overwhelm him with her emotional response, and it FREAKED himout.He could have just said, "Hey, I am dating anotherwoman right now, and I've decided that I want toget to know her better. I think you're great, butI also feel that I want to give this other situation a chance.

"Instead, he tells you NOTHING--he avoids you,stops calling, and hopes that he won't ever haveto face your criticism and judgment.It's not a particularly mature and considerate thing to do, but that's the reality of how it is with a lot of men. Not all, but definitely a lot.They don't even realize in the moment how YOU'RE feeling.all they know is that they have to do whatthey must do to avoid that confrontation they fear.

Despite this, there's reason to be hopeful that you can create the space for a man to be honest with you with really no effort.And here's something else you need to know.there's a "window of opportunity" for getting the most honesty right away, so you can screen out the men who are Mr. Wrong from the start.Be sure to know when that window is open for you,and take advantage of it.

WHY FIRST AND SECOND DATES ARE CRITICAL TIMES FOR HONESTY his is an interesting fact: a man will be MOST HONEST with you when he is NOT YET emotionally engaged or invested in your relationship yet.In other words, you can probably learn a LOT abouta man on a first or second date, when you're just getting to know each other.This is a time when he's not so afraid to share,because he's not afraid of disappointing you(since you don't know each other well enough yet).

This is when you should be listening VERY closelyto what man tells you.This is when he'll tell you things like, "I'm just looking for something casual and fun right now. Ijust got out of a long-term relationship and not into getting into the same situation anytime soon."Or he might laugh and say, "I'm a lifetime bachelor. Settling down doesn't interest me in theleast."Or, he might reveal some other dark secret, "My ex was an unhappy woman. Always complaining about onething or another about me."And that's when you need to HEAR what he's saying.And take him seriously. Know what you're in for.The man you choose is the man you get.

THE ATTITUDE & THE THREE MAGIC WORDS THAT INSPIRE HONESTY

When you want to inspire honesty in a man, so that you let him know that he is "safe" when he shares with you, you have to have what I call the"Anything is OK" attitude.Now, this doesn't mean that anything is OK for aman to do, and that you're supposed to acceptanything he does and have no boundaries or limitations.The attitude is more like you thinking, "Anythingis OK for you to share with me, but I know what Iwill and will not tolerate in my life, and what Iwant. But you can TELL ME anything. I can handle it.

"How do you communicate this attitude?
Easy.With the three little words: "I'm just curious."It can go like this."Are you seeing anyone right now? I'm justcurious?""What kind of relationship are you looking for?I'm just curious.""What kind of woman do you most admire? I'm justcurious.""Where do you see yourself in the next five years?I'm just curious."Using these three words not only lets a man knowthat you'll be OK with whatever he tells you, butthat you're not needy or too aggressive, and hecan feel safe telling you just about anything.Just don't stare at him, holding your breath,waiting for his answer. That defeats the purpose -BIG TIME.

Here's the deal.It's not that a man is afraid of certain questions. It's just that the WAY a womanasks those questions makes him feel strange.If a woman warns, "You're not seeing anyone elseright now, are you?"

It almost automaticallyinvites DISHONESTY in a man.If you want to inspire sincerity in a man, youmust have the "Anything is OK" attitude and usethose 3 magic words to get the most honestresponse possible.That way, you won't waste a lot of time going ondates with "unavailable" men, men who haveskeletons in their closet, aren't over their ex,or are actually interested in a different kind ofrelationship than you are.

Wouldn't you benefit from knowing exactly how to use the "anything is OK" attitude to screen out the right man from all the wrong ones? How to know if the man you're with now is really being honestwith you about where the relationship is headed?Or if he's lying?In my CD/DVD program, "Meeting The One," I explainhow to use the Anything is OK Attitude to maximizeyour success in dating and relationships.You'll learn how to screen for potential jerks byknowing what to do and say even BEFORE you agreeto meet on a first date.And in this program, I'll teach you what to do andsay to create amazing chemistry with the RIGHT MANand how to constantly be increasing the level ofATTRACTION between you. You'll learn:--

How certain phrases you speak can be a DEAL-BREAKER for a man when he hears it the first fewtimes he dates you.and how to avoid these at allcosts-- How to make a man see your VALUE by the thingsyou say or not, so that he will believe your"status" to be high and therefore will benaturally attracted to you-- How to make a man feel ATTRACTION from thefirst five minutes all the way through the firstfive dates using specific "counterintuitive"actions-- The secret to drawing a "non-committal" mancloser to you by making yourself a "challenge" inhis eyesIt's all right here, totally risk-free. You cantry my Meeting The One program free for a monthand learn all my best secrets to flirting, datingand attracting a man to you from the moment youmeet him:http://www.CatchHimKeepHim.com/MeetingTheOne

If you have a handle on dating and flirting, butyou are often confused by what men do and say,then there's something I want to ask you.Wouldn't you love to have more insight into whymen do the things they do, so that you could feellike you UNDERSTAND men better (and therefore havebetter relationships)?

Over the years, women have asked me the same kindof questions over and over about men, dating andrelationships:-- What makes a man "fall" for a woman? What's thesecret?-- How can I get him to really listen to me andget me?-- Why do men cheat? Do all men want to cheat?-- How can I affair-proof my relationship?-- What do men look for in a woman before they decide she's "The One"?--

Do men go through stages of maturity, and if so, what stage is my man in?I couldn't let these questions go unanswered.So I actually put together an entire and unique program that answers ALL of these questions,including more in-depth insights into why men lie,why men SEEM to be more "cold" and "in control"emotionally, and how knowing your man inside andout can bring you closer than you ever thoughtpossible.

In my "Inside the Mind of a Man" program, I helpyou understand what a man's words and actionsreally mean, and I bust the common "man myths"that are keeping you from truly and completelyconnecting with a man.To learn instantly what the 3 most common anddestructive myths are about men that are holdingyou back from love, and can tear apart anotherwise great relationships, click here and readthis
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I know that the easiest way to help you find and connect with a GOOD man is to teach you the skills to get the most honesty possible from a man, and then know what it takes for a man to feel deeply in love with you.

Do you ever wonder why a man will spend time"zoning" out in front of the TV or totally absorbed in sports, or tinkering in the garage orbrowsing the Internet? Or why he hates to "talk"about the relationship?Men have different needs when it comes to relaxingand unwinding. They also have different needs whenit comes to intimacy and getting physical.You probably know what those are. Or do you? Findout by reading about the 3 Man Myths and the truthbehind what men REALLY need and want
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