Saturday, January 31, 2009

"Five Ways to Welcome Change"

Ways to Welcome Change

The architect is a man who synthesizes, but he does not yet possess the wisdom and infinite intuition of the angels, who alone are capable of building a cathedral without planning ahead.

Welcome Change

By Elizabeth Lesser

Raise your hand if you've had a crazy year with lots of changes--good, bad, or otherwise. OK! Just as I thought; we're all in this together. The most difficult change I've been dealing with is my sister's cancer diagnosis and treatment. Sitting by her bed in the oncology unit the other day, I came across words by the great Sufi master, Hazrat Inayat Khan: "Walking on the turning wheel of the earth, living under the ever-rotating sun, man expects a peaceful life."

Reading them, I had an a-ha moment--I let go of demanding that life be predictable, easy, peaceful. Such a relief! I decided to make my New Year's resolution be about welcoming change with a willing heart. If you want to join me in this, here are some helpful ways to proceed.

Expect Change

Since we live in a changing universe, expect change. Good change, difficult change, destructive change, transformative change.

Make Friends With Change

Try not to fight change. Make unconditional friendship with it, in whatever form it arrives.

Relax Into the Mystery

There is so much more to this life than we can ever understand through our tiny brains and fearful hearts.

So in times of big change, it's good to be gentle and kind and patient with yourself. And to relax. The best peacemakers are those who are at peace with themselves.

Receive Change's Message

Be still and listen deeply for the truth that is carried on its winds--information about the past, wisdom about the present, and direction for the future.

Come Alive

Join forces with the dynamic flow of life. The African-American theologian Howard Thurman said: "Don't ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs are people who have come alive."

And so, as the old year changes into the New Year, ask what makes you come alive, and then go do it--for your own sake, and in service of the greater good.

"The Power of Influence " Good vs Evil

Good vs Evil

It has been said that wisdom begins with the definition of terms so in an effort to set the tone of this blog, I will begin with a few brief definitions taken from

Morally excellent; Virtuous; Righteous.
Evil: Morally wrong or bad; Immoral; Wicked.
Moral: of, pertaining to, or concerned with the principles or rules of right conduct or the distinction between right and wrong;

That being said, I have titled this GBE blog The Power of Influence because I'd like to address the power of association and friendship's effect for good or evil.

Over the almost 2 years I have been blogging, there have been countless folks that have mentioned the fact that they dont have a life purpose and that it was a major cause of concern for them. One of the biggest distractions we have in this area is wrong relationships - wrong relationships can so easily pull you off course from discovering and walking in your purpose.

If we dig a little deeper, its important to understand that truth must be at the core of every relationship. Now human truth is temporal. For example; At 12:30 this afternoon, I was very hungry. At 2pm, I was full. Both true statements, but they changed with time and circumstance. Universal truths and principles, right and wrong, morals, do not change. They are timeless. As Stephen Covey once said, "you cant break the rules of truth, you can only break yourself against them - they are timeless"

So the real question is Who is influencing you? Have you taken the time to evaluate your influencers? Asking questions like; a) Who do I hang with? and b) What do they have me doing? feeling? reading? listening to? saying? c) Is that okay? Try to be objective understanding that good and evil influences will BOTH take you somewhere...where do the scales tip? in what direction?

As a little girl I had big dreams, I wanted to conquer the world - I think we all did ( smile) and as I grew up, I further defined that desire more specifically. I wanted to be a person of skillful language, a gal with a positive attitude, well read, well disciplined, a person of culture and intelligence. I wanted to accomplish the goals I had set out for myself in business, as a parent, as a child of God and who I associated with had a tremendous affect on who I have become.

Make no mistake, I have certainly not arrived, far from it. But having these goals infront of me gives me a standard of measurement to determine if I am on track or off course. Are your associations adding value to your life or do they detract? Are you a better person because of their association or are you caught up in the thicket of a toxic relationship? Believe me, it matters. It matters alot. Chances are, if you hang out with folks who invest and are wealth conscious, over time, you will become wealth conscious...Mama was right on when she said " If you lie with dogs, you'll rise with fleas"

Many years ago, I realized that time is the most precious commodity I have and tomorrow is not promised so I refuse to waste it. Failure to plan and direct ones course is a choice and I refuse to abdicate that responsibility to chance and the whims of others. What a collosal waste! I cannot imagine getting to the end of my life asking myself, what on earth have I accomplished and finding nothing of significance ( shakes head). No way Jose. No way.

So yes, I choose wisely, best i know how and that knowledge grows daily as I mature and increase in wisdom and understanding - its a process, a deliberate process with standards of measuring that growth. Growth as a whole person not just in one area. I have friends who make me a better mom by their association. Some expand my knowledge in areas where I am ignorant like Astronomy - Larry is my professor.

I go to class everytime he blogs about the stars and I expand my base of knowledge. I could name so many of my friends here on Blogspot that have expanded me for good and to them, I am forever thankful and appreciative.When we take the time to read each others blogs, we have the opportunity to enter into dialog with each other and expand each others thought process - something I find very fulfilling and I have grown in the process.

Every once in a while, I will befriend someone through the GBE and when I have the opportunity to visit their page or read a non GBE blog, I realize they are not going to influence me for good so I stay away or limit my time with them depending on the level of toxicity. Thats not being snobbish, its a smart move. I protect my mind the same way I protect my home, I dont allow people to dump their trash there.

I think I have made my point. Not a real touchy, feely, blog I know, but every once in a while we need to take a minute to re-evaluate some things and make a positive change. I do it ALL the time and sometimes I am way off course like my health... I am slowly disciplining myself to do better in that area and I have a long road to hoe.

So that's it folks. Hope I made it palatable and gave you food for thought.

Remember you are loved!

"Live Life To The Fullest"

The 10 commandments are not a multiple choice.

The pursuit of happiness is the chase of a lifetime!
It is never too late to become what you might have

Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love
the people who treat you right. Forget about the
one's who don't. Believe everything happens for
a reason. If you get a second chance, grab it with!
both hands. If it changes your life, let it. Nobody
said life would be easy, they just promised it
would be worth it.

Friends are like balloons; once you let them go,
you might not get them back. Sometimes we
get so busy with our own lives and problems
that we may not even notice that we've let
them fly away. Sometimes we are so caught
up in who's right and who's wrong that we
Add Image
forget what's right and wrong.

Sometimes we just don't realize what real friendship
means until it is too late. I don't want to
let that happen so I'm gonna tie
you to
my heart
so I never lose you.

I Love You… BUT You’re Damaged Goods

**thanks to the one who suggested I write this one**

Do you know what I hate? I hate it when I’m dating a guy and the chick before me has completely screwed him up. I will accept the fact that I have been “said chick” at least once before, but we’re not talking about me today.

There’s nothing like having to deal with the emotional aftermath of a previous, destructive relationship. A lot of people call it baggage. I try to think of it as a learning curve and an opportunity. I’ll explain that in a second.

I was talking to a friend of mine the other day who was lamenting over the impossibility of a relationship with a new girl he wanted to date. He’s into her, but she’s still crushed over the last overly hormonal d-bag (I promised my mother I wouldn’t put the word douche into anymore of my blogs, oops) that trampled all over her self esteem and left her questioning her worthiness as a woman. Can’t we all relate to that? In this society it’s hard to find someone who doesn’t have their share of emotional scars. I fit into that category, as do most of you, I’m sure.

So what are we to do? Live our lives alone? I think not.

Here’s where I believe an opportunity presents itself in a relationship. If the crumpled soul that you’re heart is pining after is willing to give you a chance, you can turn that baggage into helpful information. This will require a lot of communication and honesty, but doesn’t any successful relationship require that anyway?

For the purpose of example, here’s a little TMI about yours truly. Given the events of 2008, I’m completely freaked about car accidents. If you are someone I care about in the real world, you already know this. When I text you and say, “Let me know you got home OK” I really mean it. If you don’t I’ll seriously worry that you are dead, even though my logic tells me that you just forgot. Someone only has to receive that phone call once to relate to me on this. The current object of my desire understands this about me. Every night I get a phone call or a text that says “made it home”. Hopefully, he doesn’t consider this to be overly obnoxious. He simply accepts that this is part of the package with me right now and is overly considerate of it. By doing this simple act, my baggage becomes an opportunity to better our relationship.

So, how can you turn baggage into opportunity?

Maybe he was cyber-cheated on by his last girlfriend. By giving him the password to your MySpace account, it doesn’t have to cross his mind when you sign in online.

Maybe she found inappropriate SMS messages between her ex and his female co-worker. By letting her occasionally glance through your phone, she doesn’t have to think about it every time your phone beeps.

Should you HAVE to do any of this? Of course not; it wasn’t your fault. However, should you want to make any effort possible to prove that this relationship is going to be healthy and enjoyable? You’d better or you might as well get out now before someone gets hurt.

"You're The Sweetest Thing"

~Sweetest thing i ever known~

As i walked the streets thinking of love
I stumbled across a poetry club.
I just went in to use the phone.
I saw u there all alone.
The sweetest thing i ever known.

You seemed to be nervous, as this was your first
time on the microphone.
Yet,your words were bold and strong.
me being a inspiring poet i decide to stay and listen
a little,not knowing i would fall for her like i did.

It seemed like a nice place relaxed setting,good music,
candles at the tables to set the mood and beautiful
women "obviously"so i planed to come back next weekend
hoping you would read again and so i could meet you.

So Saturday night came yearning for your name
i sat in the corner and waited for you to read.
As other poets read i see her getting her poem ready.
I could not stop staring at her 5-7 sexy frame as she
walked to the stage.Jill Scott plays low over the speaker
"lets take a long walk" But as you recite your sensual
poem my patents grows short but my heart grows fonder.
longing for your attention at the end of the night i enter
my name for next Saturdays poetry reading.
Thinking i can reach you better with my words.

Saturday night is hear,i look for you among the people
making sure i make eye contact with you while i read
so you know that i was talking to you.

As i began to read
she was "The sweetest thing i ever known"
with your caramel body tone.
You give me chills down my spine
you stimulate my mind
you give me butter flies
What are this feelings
a "Symptom unknown"
your status unknown
but your poetry
is like "Flowatree Ms."
elevating my mind to imaginative thought
knowing "I wont to go there with you"
its just "The essences of you"
that gives me "Every breath i breathe"
you know i need u in my life.
So i leave it in your hands
You take control as we talk the
night away never thinking,
I would feel "A love like this"

"Soul Connections"

From My Soul To Yours

From My Soul To Yours

Explore the worlds
From my soul to yours
Open the doors
Till you come to the sands

Lay in shades
Of the bravest waves
Let the bubbling dreams
Tickle your feet
Follow gentle smoke strands

Though I am a million miles south
We are both one breath exhaled by the sky
Open your mouth and speak me
Breathe me like a sun touched delicacy
Believe in me like a precious childhood memory

Run backwards
Through daily chores
Surrender to the adventure
From my soul to yours

If you ever start to suffer sugar
Pour the river in your coffee
Drink yourself down stream
Before you can function in reality
You must stand firm in your dreams

Tilt your edges
Like rust is your lover
Discover the beauty of yourself
Hidden in another
The journey which has searching for each other
Is only the love we are yet to uncover

Friday, January 30, 2009

Simple Steps to Increase Your Life Expectancy

Go Outside for a Longer Life Expectancy

Life expectancy can be increased with simple steps and changes. This guide will help you find ways to increase your life expectancy and improve your health and feel great as you age. Let's start with the easiest: increase your life expectancy with sunlight.

Life expectancy can be increased simply by going outside. See, what happens when you go outside is that your skin gets exposed to sunlight. That exposure triggers cells in your skin to produce Vitamin D. This vitamin (really a prohormone, but let's not worry about that here) is essential for bone health and is turning out to be important in depression, heart disease, diabetes and just about everything.

Some estimate that 50% of adults have low levels of vitamin D, because we simply don't get outside that much (sitting by a window doesn't count, the glass filters too much of the sunlight). This is a shame, because maintaining vitamin D levels has to be the easiest and cheapest way to improve your health and increase your life expectancy. Getting outside for just 15 minutes a day and exposing your hands and face to sunlight is enough to maintain vitamin D levels in most cases.

If you are concerned about your vitamin D levels, your doctor can order a simple blood test that will tell you if your levels are low. If for some reason you can't get outside enough, there are vitamin D supplements that you can take (but getting outside is a better option, if you can).

Elderly people need to pay special attention to their vitamin D levels. If you are a caregiver, be sure to assist your loved one in getting outside just a little bit every day. Not only will with improve vitamin D levels, but it could also improve sleep because sunlight also regulates another hormone in the body called melatonin that controls your sleep cycle.

Life Expectancy Increased by Hanging Out

Life expectancy can be increased by just hanging out with your friends and family. The more connected someone is, the better their overall health. Having positive relationships with a spouse, friends and family is the best way to be connected.

We are not sure why relati

onships play a role in health and life expectancy. It could be that people in positive relationships are less likely to take on risky behaviors and are more likely to take care of themselves. It could be that having people around you reduces the impact of stress on your health. We can make up lots of theories about why relationships have a positive impact, but the bottom line is that people who are engaged in "meaningful" relationships have better health (and therefore better life expectancies).

One way of improving your relationships with people is to get in the habit of telling good stories. Stories are how we communicate with one another, and telling a good story strengthens communications. I can't count the number of times I've been on the phone with someone and was just talking about the weather or giving a dry update on my family. Instead, I should be telling a story about a funny thing my kids did or something crazy that happened at work. Stories keep relationships alive.

So make more time for friends and family. Go do things together (create stories together), and make a real effort to improve your communication with them (whether by e-mail, phone or in person) by having a good story always ready for the telling.


Improve your life expectancy with a commitment to daily exercise. Why daily? Well, after carefully considering all the research and exercise recommendations out there and knowing a bit about how people form habits, I have to conclude that a daily exercise commitment is a great way to improve your life expectancy, your health and your energy level. Here's why:

A study showed that people who exercise vigorously for around 3 hours a week had DNA and cells that were 9 years younger than nonexercisers. Three hours a week is a little more than 30 minutes a day.

Forget the study, though. What I know (from personal experience and from observing others) is that if you go more than 2 days without exercising, you are at a grave danger of quitting your routine. Somehow it is w

ay too easy to slip from three days of nonexercise to three weeks of nonexercise to three months of nonexercise. The easiest way to create an exercise habit is daily repetition. When you promise yourself to exercise daily, you may skip a day but then get back on the program the following day. If you are exercising three times a week and, say, skip Friday, then you would have gone from Wednesday to Monday without exercising - a total of 4 days with no exercise (very dangerous, from a habit-building perspective). For life expectancy, it is more important that you e

xercise year after year than go through fits and starts of intense exercise followed by no exercise.

The other reason I feel that daily exercise is important, is that daily exercise will help

improve your sleep and your energy level. It is important to just rev up your whole body

each day. Remember, daily exercise doesn't have to mean going to the gym every day. Home exercises, such as yoga, stretching, free weights and more, can be incredibly effective.

Floss Daily for a Longer Life Expectancy

The fact that flossing daily can extend life expectancy falls in the weird-but-true category. In fact, floss does two things: it prevents gum disease (that's rather obvious), and it prevents heart disease (not so obvious). Preventing both of these together is what adds years to your life. Here's how flossing imp roves life expectancy:

When you floss, you help prevent your g

ums from becoming inflamed. That's a good thing. What is happening when your gums are inflamed is

that you have a chronic bacterial infection in your mouth. This harms your arteries through two mechanisms: the bacteria find their way in to your arteries and hang out (causing plaques), and your body mounts an immune response to the bacteria in your mouth, causing inflammation (which in turn can cause your arteries to narrow). This makes it hard for your heart to do its job and can lead to heart disease.

There is some debate about how many years you can gain with heart disease. Dr. Perls says 1.5 years, while Dr. Roizen says 6 years. Both of these doctors are gerontologists (aging docs) and have popular books on aging and life expectancy (see reviews: Living To 100, RealAge

and You! Staying Young). Who is right? It doesn't matter. Flossing is good for your gums and good for your heart, so we should all just do it.

Of course, this is easier said t

han done. How do you get in to a solid flossing habit? First, you need to make sure you have some floss. There are tons of different kinds of floss (flavored, unflavored, strings, ribbons and on and on). Pick some and give them a try. Next, you have to remember. Put your floss on top of your toothpaste. Har

d to forget that way. Then just do it. You already have a habit of brushing your teeth at least twice daily (right? - please say yes), so just anchor your flossing habit to that.

More Sex for a Longer Life Expectancy

Your life expectancy may be increased through having more sex. In fact, in one study, men with a high frequency of orgasms showed a 50% redu ction in mortality. This is good news, especially because issues around sex and aging are being taken more and more seriously by the medical community.

Why sex should be linked to life expectancy is something of a mystery. Of course, it could be that healthier people are more likely to have more sex and that the findings linking sex to life expectancy are reflecting this, but I think there is more

to it. We have seen elsewhere that having good relationships and being positive are linked to longer life expectancies. Maybe sex is a market for good, positive relationships. Of course, there could be a direct health benefit as well:

sex triggers all sorts of endorphins and hormones in the body. Maybe these help with healthy aging and increasing life expectancy.

But who really cares about the reason? The simple fact is that having more sex is healthy. Here's a few links to help deal with any age-related sex problems that may come up:

Be Like A Vegetarian for Your Life Expectancy

Life expectancy c an be linked to three factors that vegetarians excel at: fewer bad fats, more antioxidants and lower weight. Before we go in to how being a vegetarian can help your life expectancy, though, we have to define what we mean by vegetarian.

There are some vegetarians who are "junk food vegetarians." These types of vegetarians eat cheese pizzas and ice cream all day long. That is not good for health or life expectancy. What we mean is the person who is eating lots of vegetables prepared in healthy fats (such as olive oil) while limiting animal products, such as cheese and cream. We'll call this type

of vegetarian a

"whole foods vegetarian."

  • The leading cause of death and the number one shortener of life expectancy in the U.S. is heart disease. As your heart ages, there can be a build of gunk in your arteries and your arteries themselves can become harder (see heart aging for more information). This causes your blood pressure to rise and your he art to work harder, leaving you at risk for heart disease. Vegetarians (whole foods vegetarians) have some of the best arteries around because eating healthy vegetables avoids bad fats and other unhealthy foods.
  • People who eat lots of vegetables take in lots of antioxidants. Antioxidants help your body repair some of the damage caused by aging. The more plants you eat (and the greater variety) the more raw materials your bod has to make repairs. Read more on antioxidants and their evil counterpart, free radicals.
  • Finally, vegetables simply fill you up with very few calories (if prepared without creams, butter or cheese). A healthy vegetarian diet should help maintain or lose weight. A healthy weight is tied to a longer life expectancy.
So be more like a vegetarian to increase your life expectancy and live healthier.

Distress for a Longer Life Expectancy

Stress has been linked to dozens of health conditions, including the "big ones," such as heart disease or cancer. Stress has also been linked (no surprise) to feeling irritable and not sleeping well. By focusing on stress, you can improve your quality of life right now while improving your long-term health and life expectancy too. That's a pretty good deal.

You can distress through a wide range of stress factors.These behaviors includes comfort of eating & smoking.Learn to relax through distressing techniques or meditation to keep your life expectancy up where it should be.

My other more long-term stress reduction techniques. My personal favorite is called the "relaxation response." This is a scientifically proven breathing technique that will help train your body how to responsed to the stressful events in your life.

Another effective relaxation technique is meditation. By learning how to meditate, you not only calm your body, but you begin to train your mind. This is great for mental fitness, concentration and (of course) relaxation.

Extend Your Life Expectancy Through Screenings and Tests

Improving your life expectancy through medical tests and health screenings is certainly not one of the "fun ways to live longer," but it is, without a doubt, one of the most effective ways to add healthy years on to your life. Medical tests and screenings can help treat diseases early, when they are more treatable, and extend life expectancy even with an illness or disease.

Of course, the challenge is figuring out what tests to take when. Only your doctor can really tell you 100% (every individual is different in terms of risk factors and family history), but we can check out so

me general guidelines for health screenings (see Health Screenings for Women or Health Screenings for Men).

I like to think of health screenings as part of a disease prevention program. Preventing diseases (or catching them early) is probably the single best way to add years to your life expectancy. Make a plan today to prevent disease, get everything checked and feel good that you are doing everything you can for a longer life expectancy.

Turn Off Your TV for a Longer Life Expectancy

If life expectancy and television watching aren't linked, I'd be shocked. Of course, I can't prove that TV and life expectancy are linked (no one has done a study comparing the life expectancy of TV-watchers and non-watchers, probably because they can't find enough non-watch ers for a good study). I really do think that cutting back on television watching would improve most people's health and (therefore) increase their life expectancy. Here's a couple of reasons:
  • Watching TV makes you inactive. You just sit there burning as few calories as possible, which could lead to weight problems.
  • TV makes you eat more junk food. People who are watching TV eat more than those who don't. It's a fact.
  • TV makes you antisocial. You are at home, zoned in, instead of talking with real people, face-to-face.
  • TV is stressful. The news and many shows are filled with stressful stories. Avoid these, and you may feel things are not so bad after all.
  • TV keeps you from doing other things. This is the big one for me. The average person watches something like four hours of TV every day. That is 28 hours a week or more than 1,400 hours a year. If we all just put that time in to something else (exercise, volunteering, talkin g with our children), think of what a different world it would be.
Of course, I can't tell you how many years of life you will gain if you quit watching TV (it depends on your weight and what you do with the extra time), but I can tell you that you will gain back around 1,400 hours each year (on average).

Avoiding Risks Increases Life Expectancy

Life expectancy can be protected by making sure that you don't take any unnecessary risks. For young people, the biggest causes of death aren't diseases or age-related problems. The biggest causes of death for young people are accidents, injuries and violence. When you add certain behaviors (such as smoking) to that list (which shortens life expectancy by up to 14 years), you get a list of things to avoid to protect your life expectancy.

Here's the list (I know, it sounds like nagging, but do these things anyway): wear your seat belt, drive defensively, avoid situations that may lead to injury, avoid risky sex, avoid violent situations, don't smoke (or quit smoking if you do smoke) and maintain a healthy weight.

If you can do those things, then you are already increasing your life expectancy. Focus on avoiding obvious risks and dangers. Your body is pretty amazing and will keep going for a long time as long as you keep it out of trouble.

"Never pay A Monthly Phone BIll Again‏"

Magic Jack

don't be left out , don't pay another phone bills next month

the alternative is right here in front of you

who need expensive phone bills anyway...............

Make phone bills disappear

Moving Upward and Onward

Moving Upward and Onward

Don't Sell Yourself Short
It's not what you have but what you do with what you have that will determine your success or failure. Abraham Maslow, the great psychologist said that the story of the human race is the story of people selling themselves short. He said people have a tendency to settle for far less from life than they are truly capable of. Many people are spinning their wheels in careers where they should be moving rapidly onward and upward. Here's how you can put your career on the fast track.

Choose Your Parents Carefully
Someone once said that the key to success was to choose your parents carefully. That may be partially true but it is even more important to choose your job or career with great care. The choice of a job or occupation for which you are ideally suited comes before anything else. If you try to work at something you don't enjoy or don't believe in, you'll never be happy, and you'll never be successful.

Be the Best At What You Do
Which leads us to the next point. If you want to reach the stars in your career, you have to become excellent at what you do. You have to pay any price, go any distance, spend any amount of time necessary to "be the best." Extraordinary rewards only go for extraordinary performance; average rewards for average performance; below average rewards, insecurity and failure for below average performance. And here's a vital key, you are being paid today exactly what you're worth - no more, no less. If you want to earn more, you must increase your worth, your value to others.

The Key to Motivation
The reason why choosing the right career, why doing what you love to do is so important, is because unless you really care about your work, you will never be motivated to persist at it until you become excellent. And until you become excellent at what you're doing, you can't move ahead.

The Key to Peak Performance
The antidote to these fears is the development of courage, character and self-esteem. The opposite of fear is actually love, self-love and self-respect. Acting with courage in a fearful situation is simply a technique that boosts our regard for ourselves to such a degree that our fears subside and lose their ability to effect our behavior and our decisions.

Action Exercises
Here are two things you can do to be more successful in your career.

First, set high standards for yourself and recognize that anything that someone else has achieved, you can probably achieve as well. There are no limits.

Second, select one key skill area that is important in your job and resolve to become absolutely excellent in that area. Start today to get better and better.

 your way to the top

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"What Women Want All Men To Know!"

."Women Want Words".

You guys might want to note that his blog readers are mostly hot women. He might just have a point, huh?
Since a few of you have asked recently when I'm gonna do another "advice" type blog, I thought I'd expound on that thought some and post a few other things that women wish men knew:

*She will eventually leave if you lie.
(Misrepresenting what you want from a relationship or from her constitutes a "lie".) Telling her that she's pretty when she looks like shit from the flu does NOT fall under the category of "lie".

*We are as obsessed with our beauty as you are your penises. We get the same charge from hearing "you are beautiful" that you get from hearing that you have a beast behind your zipper. It doesn't ever get old, and you'll want to hear it over and over, right? So do we. It doesn't matter if we KNOW we're beautiful... we want to know that YOU think we are.

*Our necks are errogoneous zones. Seriously. You can get her panties to drop if you know how to treat her neck. Remember guys, unless she's specifically told you it's something she likes... not wet above the neck. Keep your tongue to yourself.
One of the sexiest things in the WORLD is when a man leans in from behind you to whisper something near your ear. This can make her think about you in a sexual way if she never has before.

*She is going to freak out and imagine that she's pregnant a day or two before every period, whether she has any rational reason to believe it or not. This would not be a good time to berate her for forgetting to take her pills.

*she is scared of losing her independance, and she is scared of becoming her mother (no matter how cool her mother is).

*PMS does not make women bitchy, it lowers their tolerance for bullshit. Big difference. Women let lots of stuff go for 25 days out of the month...for 5 days they don't have the patience to do so. Be grateful for the 25... and endure the rest with good attitude.

*She forgives you more than she should and more than you probably deserve.

*Sex does not wipe the slate clean. If you did something stupid and you have great sex... you think it's all better. It's not. The only things that will permanently put the issue to rest? Either talking it through, or buying her a gift that expresses her importance to you.

*Women don't just want to know that you care ... they NEED to know.
Women need to feel beautiful, they need good sex, and they need to know that you value them in some way.

Most women don't stray from relationships just because they want laid, they do it because they need to feel beautiful, sexy and appreciated (and they probably aren't getting that at home).

*If she doesn't want sex with you it's because a)she doesn't feel sexy... could be anything from premenstrual bloat to having caught an unflattering reflection in a three way mirror. b)she's not feeling connected to you c)she is manipulating you to get what she wants from you.

*Shoes usually determine whether or not you're fasionable.

*She expects you to call. Women judge your interest in them by how much effort you put into contacting her. If you're honestly too busy for a short conversation, text, or email... TELL her so (and when you're likely to resurface again)... if you don't, she will assume that you are just not that into her.

*If you've ever wondered what to say when she expresses disgust at her appearance, asks you how an outfit looks, or compares herself unfavorably to other women, "you are beautiful" is NEVER a wrong answer (even if she rolls her eyes when she hears it).

*We mull things over. If you do something that disturbs us, we may not tell you about it right away. We think it over first. Sometimes for days. If you've done something thoughtless and stupid and she doesn't chew you out over it first still doesn't mean you're off the hook.
Women will find out 5 minutes into a first date that their date is wildly unacceptable, yet most will smile and continue on with the date as though nothing is wrong...only to then drop off the face of the planet.

*Asses are important to women. If you have a great one... display it to full advantage. We love it when you walk around the house naked, or in snug fitting jockeys ;)

*Don't ever tell us what to do.

*Don't ever treat us as though you own us.

*Our nipples aren't knobs or handles, don't treat them as either.

*If you're having sex on a regular basis, and you want it to continue, ask her to spend the night.

*If she's spent the night, you are obligated to feed her breakfast.

*If a woman touches you, she's probably attracted. We don't touch men we aren't attracted to on some level.

*If she's attracted, and you ask her out directly, she'll probably say "yes".

*We want men to take the lead.

*We are impressed when you ask us advice, confide in us... or trust us with your secrets and dreams.

*Women are expressive. We have to tell you stuff if we feel it. It's in our nature. If you show a woman that you don't hear her, you show her that you don't care about her. Listen. Even if you have to fake it.

*If she's smiling, she's happy. Remember what caused the smile and do it again at every opportunity.

*Whether she's a platonic friend, a friend with benefits, a wife or a third date...she needs to know what you are thinking and/or feeling about her.

*when it doubt, go with the shirt that matches your eye color.

*women get urinary tract and yeast infections very easily. Wash your hands before you touch her.

*and while you're at it, clip your nails. You may well think you're putting a woman into the throes of ecstacy when you're really clawing her to bits with a sharp nail shard or a rogue hangnail. It's a delicate area...please be careful.

*Amaze her.
foreplay begins before the clothes come off for a woman, hopefully you know that already... but it's not so much about the act itself as it is the man. Regardless of the nature of the relationship, she's there because she sees something unique and wonderful about you. FOrget what you've been learning about sexual technique. Talk to her... let her know you, let her know that you want to know her in return. THAT is what leads to phenomenal sex.

*You might have heard that women want to be treated as equals. That's not true. Women want to be treated as equals in the boardroom and on the pay scale, with a man , they want to be treated like women.

*some women say that they want a sensitive man. They do not. If you cry in front of her or fall apart she will lose respect for you. She wants a MAN... but a man who listens to her. If she wanted to be with a girl, she'd be with a girl.

*I'll say it again (it counts at least twice) women want you to share parts of you with them. TALK. They want you to want to know who they are, so LISTEN.

*women remember everything about your relationship.

*Most women would rather have you break up with them than string them along when you don't want to be there and/or have you cheat on them.

*Even nice girls like hushed dirty talk in public places.

*We love clean sweat. You are sexy as hell when you've just come from the gym or mowing the lawn. Stale sweat? YUCK!

*women cannot resist a man who is holding a baby, or baby talking to a dog.

*we think you are extraordinarily sexy when you are concentrating... especially when you are fixing something appropriately manly :)

*always greet her with kisses

*If you have to ask yourself if it's cheating, it IS.

*Don't wait until the next day to return her messages... we're back to that thing where she judges her importance to you by how you stay in contact with her.
That doesn't mean that you have to drop everything when she calls... she's busy, too... she just needs to know that she matters to you.

*If the only time you kiss her or show her physical affection is during foreplay, she'll soon start to feel like it's all about sex and resent it when you want to play. Give her kisses and touches for no reason, with no strings attached. Hold her hand, stroke her hair. This reassures a woman that you appreciate more of her than just the wet parts ;)

*We love it when you dance with us in the living room.

*we love sex every bit as much as you do, but we need to feel connected to you first.

Ladies , feel free to add to the list as you please.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

"Too Late?"

when it is too late?

When is it too late, when love decides to no longer wait?
You go on for so long, not wanting to believe we belong.
For years you carry that weight, turning your back on Fate.
Perhaps I was wrong, but I still only want to sing your song.

You go on for so long, not wanting to believe we belong,
wondering what is true…when to quit….what to pursue.
Perhaps I was wrong, but I still only want to sing your song.
Hear the music calling you; what does your heart say to do?

Wondering what is true…when to quit….what to pursue...
the questions plague me, and my heart and head disagree.
Hear the music calling you; what does your heart say to do?
It’s a lonesome place to be, waiting within a silent plea.

The questions plague me, and my heart and head disagree.
Battle scarred from long ago, not sure how to let go.
It’s a lonesome place to be, waiting within a silent plea,
and before you know, you’re at the end with nothing to show.

Battled scarred from long ago, not sure how to let go. For so long you carry the weight, turning your back on Fate, and before you know, you’re at the end with nothing to show. When is it too late, when love decides to no longer wait?

"100 Ways To Love"

Expressing Ones Emotions

1. Hug them.

2. Write a love note.

3. Call them at work just to say "Hi."

4. Give them a foot massage.

5. Tell them a joke.

6. Caress them with slow gentle strokes.

7. Go for a walk with them.

8. Send them a "happy gram."

9. Admit your mistakes.

10. Say: "I love you."

11. Indulge a whim.

12. Listen to them talk about an interest of theirs.

13. Be trustworthy.

14. Instead of complaining, tell them what you would prefer.

15. Look at them when you're in a discussion.

16. Send flowers.

17. Compliment something they did.

18. Offer to help.

19. Ask them to show you how to do something.

20. Call when you are going to be late.

21. Take them out to dinner.

22. Write them a poem about how special they are.

23. Cut out a cartoon they'll enjoy.

24. Ask them what they'd like sexually.

25. Go shopping together.

26. Take an afternoon drive.

27. Cuddle.

28. Put your arm around them in front of others.

29. Take them out on a surprise date.

30. Do something they want to do.

31. Listen.

32. Plan a candle light dinner.

33. Look at old photos together.

34. Serve them breakfast in bed.

35. Hold hands.

36. Share sexual fantasies.

37. Do a work project together.

38. Rub their back.

39. Take a shower together.

40. Carry their photo in your wallet.

41. Go away together for a weekend holiday.

42. Kiss them.

43. Smile more when you look at them.

44. Go for a bicycle ride together.

45. Surprise them with "special" attire.

46. Plan a picnic lunch.

47. Read something together about how to have a better relationship.

48. Repeat what they say before answering.

49. Say "Good morning" first.

50. Ask if they have a few minutes first before interrupting.

51. Send them a card.

52. Surprise them with a gift when it's a non-holiday.

53. Cook them a favorite meal.

54. Try a new restaurant.

55. Ask them how they feel.

56. Let them know when you are proud of them.

57. Ask for their opinion.

58. Turn on some romantic music.

59. Dedicate a song to them.

60. Send them a balloon bouquet.

61. Watch a sunset together.

62. Play a game together.

63. Have them teach you something they know.

64. Tell them they have the night off.

65. Go to a movie they select.

66. Ask them for a hug.

67. Wear some new cologne.

68. Take them to Bali.

69. Discuss future plans with them.

70. Ask if you can help when they look sad.

71. Ask them about their dreams.

72. Meet them for lunch.

73. Enlarge a scenic photo of a place you've shared.

74. Give them a gift certificate for their favorite store.

75. Tell them what you like about them.

76. Buy them a new perfume.

77. Take them to a scenic spot.

78. Send them a gourmet gift basket.

79. Send them a joke card.

80. Let them know when you've thought of them during the day.

81. Buy them a toy.

82. Compliment them to their friends.

83. Bring them a thirst quenching drink.

84. Tell them when they look attractive.

85. Send them a post card.

86. Invite them to a secret rendezvous.

87. Give them a massage.

88. Take a lesson with them.

89. Look at photos together of when you met.

90. Plan a vacation with them.

91. Listen openly to their opposing opinion.

92. Buy them a new piece of jewelry.

93. Watch a TV show they like with them

94. Write them a letter.

95. Listen to music with them, such as an old favorite.

96. Whisper sweet nothings in their ear.

97. Tell them what you like that they do.

98. Give a head massage.

99. Invite them to a concert.

100. Let them know you care.