Thursday, September 4, 2008

"Love Connections"

When our eyes first met
It was August 2001 and I was signing my then 4 year old daughter out of school since she had stayed after for Pom & Cheer. This was her very first year and we were new at the school and so I was fumbling, trying to figure out the exact protocol to collect my child, while also balancing a one year old on my hip and a huge mommy purse over my other shoulder. I could feel heavy eyes upon me, and I turned sensing that I was being stared at.

He was standing across the room, just staring at me, a fact he made no attempt to hide when I turned around and caught him. He just smiled wickedly. He was also waiting for his daughter to finish Pom & Cheer, and still, he kept staring. I blushed, and looked at the ground uncomfortably, trying to pull away from his gaze, wondering what I had done to get the attention from such a handsome man. It was probably because I was so tall or because I'm obviously so clumsy and lost, or I must have peanut butter on me somewhere again.

I was married with a 4 year old and a 1 year old so it never occurred to me… it just didn't occur to me at all why he was looking at me. I recognized him though, I felt like I was looking at someone I had known for all eternity, someone that it would be more than natural to walk up to and talk to like we were the best of friends. And still, he watched me.

I was becoming more and more uncomfortable with his attention, he smiled at me, and I automatically smiled back and then immediately turned to face away from him. So he walked over to the sign out sheet, ran his finger down the page, found my name, and looked up at me and smiled again on purpose! And now he knew my name too. I wanted to fade right into the wall.

I wondered what kind of karma I had with this man. What would our connection be? Why did I feel such a strong pull towards him? Why had he suddenly appeared in my life? I was a very nerdy, stay at home mom and never got attention from any men at all. And certainly, I hadn't been interested in anyone new in years.

Four years later after Anthony made love to me for the very first time and I lay naked in his arms pressed up against his chest, he would recount every single detail of that moment that he first saw me. How he watched me walk in the door. How I was wearing jeans and a cropped white tank top that showed off my pierced belly button and all he wanted to do was run his hands over my bare stomach. How I had bleached blond hair and he couldn't wait to run his fingers though it. How he knew at that moment that I belonged to him, and it was only a matter of time. All he had to do was be patient. He said he also noticed the ring on my finger, but thought it was ridiculous since I was going to be his. He said that he knew at that moment that I was the one for him. I already belonged to him.

For me the moment was a few weeks later, September 20th, 2001. That was when he put his hand on my shoulder to get me to turn around, and asked me a question. It felt like electricity shot from his hand all down my body. Overwhelmed, I accidentally stood much too close to him, but he didn't move away.

He finally had the nerve to speak to me and came up with a good excuse, but I barely heard a thing he was saying since the magnetism between us was unlike anything I had ever felt before. In that moment that he first touched me, I knew. He was asking me about the shirt I was wearing to support a 9/11 charity, somehow I offered to drive an hour across town and buy some for him.

When I got into my van I just sat there trying to wake myself up and figure out what had happened. I was holding his business card and $200 in cash in my hand and I had never even told him my name, but his was on the card. Who does that? I drove across town to pick up the shirts; my best friend from High School ran the charity. She wanted me to call Anthony and thank him for the donation. I said, "NO WAY, I can't even speak to him. He gets me all excited. I am going to end up with that man." She looked at me like I had two heads and said, "But you're married."I said, "Yeah, that's the part I haven't figured out yet." That was 2001.

It would be another six weeks till we would discover that we had just purchased the last two houses on the same street and would be next door neighbors. We were both moving in the same exact week. We would also find out that this wasn't the first time we were neighbors. We lived near each other at the same time in college, and in 1998 we lived in the same apartment complex in units that were facing each other for the exact same months. Phoenix is a huge city, so it was more than unusual that we had been neighbors so many times. It was as if some force, or God, or the universe, was purposely putting us in each other's paths so we could find each other.
In 2005 my husband and I decided to divorce.

Much to my amazement, the day after he moved out, Anthony called to talk to my ex. I told him he would have to call the office, because my husband moved out since we were getting divorced. Turns out that Anthony was newly single too. He was in St. Louis on business, but he would be home soon, and he wanted to see me. On September 25th, 2005, four years after he first saw me, he kissed me for the very first time. I swear I saw fireworks, got all weak in the knees, and all most fainted. That was the first time anyone had ever made me feel that way by kissing me, I thought that sorta silly phenomenon only happened in movies where they were being dramatic and mushy.

I don't think two people ever wanted each other so badly.

This week, almost three years later, we couldn't find time to meet so I could drop stuff off to him. I argued that I only need 30 seconds to hand him things. He said he required much more than thirty seconds to see me. I said,

"Come on, you can't see me for just a few seconds?"Anthony said, "No way, when I look at you, or get close to you, I want you just as much as the very first day I saw you seven years ago. I have to touch you. I have to kiss you. I can't help myself. Tell me you can see me and not want to touch me?"He's right of course.

I can't see him with out wanting to be pressed right up against him. When I am with him, I don't want to be anywhere else on Earth, and I feel like I'm home. Each time he kisses me it's like the very first time. Each time he text messages me, I'm a giggly as a teenager with a bad case of puppy love!

I wrote this blog a few months ago in response to a few other bloggers who wrote on whether or not they believed in LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT. I countered that I did because it has impacted my life quite significantly.

Do you believe in LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT???


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