Are you still in love?Should you tell them?Did they move on?
These are some of the main questions after a break-up that Ive had to ask myself a lot. Im sure a lot of you out there have the same questions that you wish someone could just answer for you,but as we all know it doesn't work like that....sucks I know! When you split up with someone you have been in a long lasting relationship with, it can be very difficult to stop some of the feelings that you have for him or her still. Sometimes even though you know that the split is for the best, your mind might still continue to wonder and think about your ex. There is no easy or magic formula for getting him or her out of your mind. However, there are a few steps listed next that may or may not help.
1.Think Back!!!
-Think of all of the things that made you split. When your mind goes down memory lane...make sure that it also travels the rocky and bumpy road that caused the break up. Then remember all of the reasons that made you decide to part ways to begin with. Another thing put away things that remind you of him or her. Things he or she gave you (especially pictures of them or the both of you).
2.Your freeeee!!! Like free Willy!!!! :)
-Enjoy your newly found "freedom". There are many previously forbidden things that you can do now that he/she won't be around to tell you not to do them. Indulge in as much football watching, beer drinking and pool playing that your heart desires, because you are now free to do them without repercussions and girls do as much flirting, partying, hanging out with who ever, and so much more as well.
3. Stay Away!!!!!
(I mean it)-Find different places to hang out. Try to stay away from places that you went together, bcuz if you...you'll be sitting there like "DAMN!" Any mutual friends should also be off limits just for now though. (Not a permanent thing) You should still go out with your friends and have fun!!! Even if you may not think that you feel up to going out, seriously go ahead and make your absolute "best" effort to have a good time. Listen to me! I'm not lying!
4. Get yourself together!!!
-Repair your damaged ego. Your ego may have just taken a heavy blow if you were not the one that wanted the break up. Start slowly in getting yourself back into dating shape again by doing some fun activities like taking dance lessons or get a membership at the gym. This will let you get back into physical shape, build your ego and you could possibly meet new people in the process.
5. PEACEEEEE!!!
-Think about the positive things to come. If your ex did things or had faults that made life difficult for you, just imaging the positive things that will be in your life without the mental stress that he/she had once created for you. Once you can get out of the limbo state of wanting him or her back, you can finally get some closure and peace of mind to move on in peace.
Are you making these mistakes?
Calling your partner constantly after the break up.
Saying “I Love you” over and over and how much you can’t live without them.
Trying to convince them that you’ll change and everything will be different this time.
Begging and crying, acting out of desperation in the hopes that they will feel “sorry” for you and take you back.
Trying to use reason and logic to get them to come back.
Resorting to arguing, blaming and guilt trips when all else hasn’t worked.
Doing absolutely nothing because you’re afraid to make things worse!
If your doing any of those things make sure you are to try and stop yourself. Your not helping the situation at hand any easier on yourself...you know the saying if you set it free and it comes back, it was always yours and if it doesn't it just wasn't meant to be. Its pretty much like that. Which isn't always such a "BAD" thing! And that's something that some ppl need to realize.Okay, now this part is for those out there that are searching for guidance when it comes to confronting their ex about their feelings. If your ex happens to already be moved on and in a new healthy happy relationship...plz do not tell him/her. The reason I say this is bcuz you might ruin something he/she is sharing with someone. Telling him or her you love them will be selfish and could cause problems between you too. Rly think about some things:"Do you think you would feel the same about him/her if she didn't have a new significant other?"Maybe, just maybe you really do still love him/her...but maybe you are just in love with the "idea" of her.Don't sit there and tell your ex you still love them or that you want them back if they already have a strong,happy,healthy relationship...that could start problems between the both of you or between ur ex's previous relationship! "Why would you want to come between that?"............................................................................................
If you rly love your ex, you will be strong enough to let him/her be with the person that makes them happy. You will sit there and just be happy that they found happiness! :)Here's another situtation: Ex is single still!I feel that if your ex is still single and isn't kind of seeing someone already, then you should go straight ahead and tell them how you feel. I believe in fighting for what you love. I mean thats what I did. Im not gunna sit here and lie to you saying I won him back, bcuz I didn't...don't get me wrong I fought long and hard. I put up a pretty good fight if you ask me, but not everything can go back to the way it was.
And that's when we need to face the facts that its over. I did and now look at me...im still HAPPY! I mean me and my ex still to this day talk and have a very healthy relationship. We still are in love, but we don't let that interfere with our lives and friendship. We just came to terms that we were better off friends. If we can do it so can you!!!"From all that though I learned that no matter what he will always have a place in my life and heart. I will carry him with me forever and into every relationship I have." "So it comes to the last question""What are you going to do?"
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