Saturday, April 26, 2008


Developing a relationship isn’t easy. It involves entering completely into another man’s world, and that can be a frightening thing. His family, his friends? His personal history? Pretty heavy stuff. Don’t let it scare you. It’s no monster – it is, in fact, the road to the happy ending you’re after.

One of the most pivotal elements is respect. Mutual respect. You have no choice if you want the real thing. It’s tough, again, and I know this. But you must give to get and, in the case of relationships, giving means being open to what he’s into and what makes him the man he is. If he’s the man you think he is, he’ll return the favor.

As your relationship begins, think about who you are and who he is. What are you willing to compromise for the sake of this partnership? How much of what he is attracts you enough to make you want to do it with all your heart? If you’re sincere about wanting the real thing – and that’s why you’re here – you owe it to yourself to answer these questions.

Remember: we all live in our own private universes. We are the center. That means he’s the center of his own too. Respect his life and respect his feelings. As you expect your own desires and dreams to be treated properly, so does he. And, if the attraction is there, it’s more than worth the effort. Maybe the relationship won’t work out. You may make other contacts in the future. But you’ll be guilty of nothing more than have trying to give your best to him.

We live in the age of entitlement and this makes it rougher. We all believe our due is the perfect guy. Yet we’re far from perfect ourselves, a fact we often overlook when we interact with men on my partner. We’re impatient. We want it now and we want it fabulous. Real partnership calls for a lot more, and I think you can give it.

The good news? It can be fabulous. Just be available to him in a truly emotional way. Express caring. Convey concern. At the very least, listen to him. Be a friend. You may find you’re paving the way to the thing you wanted from the start. At the worst, you made a strong connection with another man.

I reiterate: listen. Hear what your partner is saying. He’s communicating a great deal, especially if you read between the lines. And, if you have a real affection for him, you’ll want to do this. There’s nothing more rewarding than giving to someone you have feelings for. That’s when the true fireworks start, the blasts that come from the heart and soul.

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