Saturday, April 26, 2008

"Satisfying Your Lust"

If you're like most people, on at least a few occasions you've found yourself in the situation where sex isn't equally fulfilling for both partners. The good news is, this is not an uncommon problem. And the better news is, it's also not incurable. Mutually satisfying sex, the kind that leaves both partners basking in that post-sex glow awash in bonding hormones, is possible. Here are three ways to help make sure you're both getting the best - ahem - bang for your buck.

Consider the problem

First off, if you don't know what the problem is between your sheets (pre-mature ejaculation, not enough foreplay, discomfort or bad body image are some examples) try to isolate it for yourself. The reason behind this is that only by knowing what is wrong can you fix it - and the problem will help to determine your approach.
From there, it's time to think about what a great sex life would entail for you - or at least what you think it would look/be/feel like. Before you can remedy a mediocre routine, you've got to know where to aim. Opening with a goal like, "Honey I'm thinking I might like to try this," might just be the opening you need, which brings us to, tip two.

Talk about it

One of the most common troubles couples have when it comes to a single-sided (or no-sided) sex life is unwillingness to discuss the matter. It's considered embarrassing or improper. But that's silly! Sex is a necessary and vital part of any relationship. And odds are, if it's not working in bed, it's not working someplace else, which is why you need to open your mouth. No pun intended.
The thing is, the topic of sex is as tender as it is natural. You want to be sure your mate doesn't feel criticized, or you're apt to make things even worse. So consider the previous advice. Suggest something you'd like to try that's designed specifically to address the problem. For instance, in the case of premature ejaculation, maybe you want to really take it slow and try a long, drawn out fantasy. Another approach? Ask if your partner wants to know something you'd like. If the answer's yes, once you've told them, ask to know something they'd like in return.

Be willing to compromise

On that note, it's important to remember that mutually satisfying is the goal, thereby you want to think about more than just yourself. How can you please your partner while still getting what you want? Make it your aim to be the best giver you can be as well as the best receiver. Sex is just like everything else, it's dependent on the energy all the participants put into it! Don't settle for dissatisfaction. Sometimes, it's easy to let your own satisfaction go by the wayside once your partner has found theirs. That's one surefire way to guarantee you don't get what you need. Instead, be clear on what you like and want and insist that you get it, however gently you have to do so. It may involve giving your partner some lessons or asking more than once, but you'll find that once you've broken down that barrier and shared, you'll be closer and more turned on by each other, for it.">click .................

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