Saturday, May 3, 2008

"All about Marriage"


The decision to get married is probably one of the most important life decisions you will ever make. You would naturally want everything to go well. The information below seeks to help you and your partner "breeze" through the path towards marriage. All the best in your new life journey ahead! A memorable wedding, a happy marriage and a perfect home are things all couples dream of. However, this can’t be achieved through love and romance alone. Serious commitment and hard work is needed as well. The key to a happy and healthy marriage involves developing your relationship with your partner and knowing each other well enough to understand how you want to share your lives together. It is also important to develop necessary skills, such as communication, parenting, financial and time management skills, in order to create a successful marriage.

Are you ready for marriage?.

Questions you should ponder:

Is this person right for me?
Am I right for this person?
Qualities that make good partners:

Capacity for love
Ability to understand the feelings of others
Economically stable
Similarity in religious faith
Similarity in family background
Similarity in lifestyle and outlook of life

Why do you want to marry?.

It is important that you enter marriage with realistic expectations.

Some reasons why people marry:
- To enjoy lifelong companionship and mutual support
- To have a sense of fulfillment in being married
- To meet sexual & physical needs
- To have children

Wrong reasons to marry:
- To escape family problems
You may find that family problems are not resolved by marriage.
- To escape feelings of loneliness or insecurity
You may be disappointed as both these feelings may also be experienced in marriage.
- Being pressured into marrying by friends or family
This is not a good enough reason for getting married.
- Fear of being ‘left on the shelf’
This is not a sufficient reason for marriage.
- Premarital pregnancy
You need to deal with the pregnancy separate from marriage.

Marriage Readiness Checklist.

Discuss with your partner if you agree or disagree on the following questions:

1. How is our relationship?

We can talk easily with each other
We can deal with conflicts satisfactorily
We feel loved and accepted by each other
We know and have met each other’s family
2. Are we ready financially?

At least one of us has a stable job
We have savings for the wedding
We are financially independent
Marriage is lifetime commitment, so it is important that you are adequately prepared for it. Ponder carefully over your reasons for wanting to get married to be sure that you are ready to take the plunge.

Marriage Preparation Courses.

Marriage Preparation Courses help to prepare you and your partner for your journey. Both of you can expect to learn about the following interesting and enriching topics:

Marriage roles and responsibilities
Finance management
Sexual intimacy
Conflict management
Relationship with in-laws
Knowing each other and family-of-origin issues
Personality tests (optional) to gain a deeper understanding of each other. Eg. Taylor-Johnson Temperament Analysis (T-JTA), Myer-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), PREPARE inventory

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