Tuesday, May 6, 2008
"All About Trust & Relationship"
With all of the advice out there on how to rebuild your relationship, why not look at tips to keep your already healthy relationship in tact?
There are plenty of things that you should avoid in order to make your relationship with your wife or girlfriend from unnecessary miscommunication as well as arguments.
In fact, these tips can help you in every relationship that you have – read on.
1- DON’T be right all the time.There’s nothing more frustrating in a relationship than a person who insists that they are always right. No one is right all of the time, and it’s time that you realized that.
It takes a much stronger person to admit that they were wrong than it is for someone to not admit that they may have made a mistake. Don’t be the know it all.
2- DON’T refuse to apologize.You will have something that you need to apologize for at some point, even if you don’t think that it’s a big deal. When you allow your partner to hear that you are sorry about something, you allow them to see that you are willing to move past something in order to have a healthier relationship.
And even if you don’t think that you are wrong, apologizing is a great way to start fixing the situation instead of making it worse.
3- DON’T know the other person better than they know themselves.If you’ve ever been in a fight or a discussion when another person has claimed to know what you want, doesn’t that feel upsetting? You want to avoid doggedly trying to prove that you know more about the other person than they do – because that just isn’t the case.
Take the time to consider their feelings and thoughts when they tell them to you. To not let them have a say is to make the conversation one sided.
4- DON’T assume anything.When you start to assume something, you start to chip away at the truth. IF you want to know about something, the other person is going to have to tell you what you need to know.
Assuming that someone feels a certain way or that they want you to do a certain thing is only going to set you up for possible problems. Assuming is really just guessing.
5- DON’T rub it in.If you do find out that you are right about something, you don’t want to constantly rub the fact in long after the discussion is over. Your relationship isn’t about someone being right; it’s about the two of you being happy. If you’re right, you’re right, but then you need to move on. Your partner will not appreciate being reminded that they were wrong.
6- DON’T put your priorities first.While you both want to have your needs and wants addressed, when you try to focus more on your own needs than your partner’s needs, you will be seen as selfish and uncaring. A relationship means that you are putting someone else’s needs before your own, and in doing so, allowing your needs to be fulfilled as well. Seek out their needs to see how you can compromise to make both of you happy.
7- DON’T interrupt them when you’re trying to make a point, you might feel that your words are more important than theirs, but this is not helpful.
If you are interrupting what someone else is saying all the time, two things happen: one, you’re not hearing what they are saying, and two, you are showing that your opinions are more important than theirs. Instead, stop yourself and make a mental note to bring up your point when they are finished.
8- DON’T make promises you can’t keep.You aren’t going to be perfect, but when someone is counting on you to help maintain a good relationship; you need to be able to hold up your part of the bargain. This means that you need to be able to make promises that you can keep. And when you do make a promise to someone, they need to be able to expect that you will follow through – every time.
If you can’t make a promise, then let them know that you will try your hardest, but that you can not promise it. This allows them to have realistic expectations of you.No relationship is perfect, but there are plenty of ways that you can keep it from becoming unhealthy.